List of true but useless facts: Did you know,

List of true but useless facts: Did you know, that Graham Bell wanted people to say "Ahoy-hoy" on the telephone, instead of "Hello"? Did you know, that spiders have 48 knees?

Horses have 205 bones in their body. 34 of those bones are skull bones

and with my immortaity injections, by the time I was 130, I was just blubber rolling around in a jar. Thank goodness for my Waldo appendages, I could change the remote.

I could even do my hair in any style! Yes, with Waldo appendages, you can do all your work and have time left over to pay our enormous bill. Call today and we'll add a Waldo head

!" A Waldo for EVERY appendage & a head to boot?" Being only a torso myself, this was a dream offer. The only problem was how to call the toll-free number in my present state.

Of Nebraska. My present state is Nebraska. I had a hard time wrapping it so I just stuck it in this old Winnie The Pooh present bag I found somewhere in Nebraska. Was it Waldo?

No. It wasn't Waldo, NE I was in when I bought the Winnie The Pooh present bag that I presently had a present in. I remembered! I had pre-sent the Winnie The Pooh present bag from

Tree City, PA. The post office was in a tree house, and a Japanese Sparrow lady waited on me. Her postmark was in Japanese. Who did I send it to? I thought about Uncle Mars or Aunt

Claudia but I didn't know diddly-squat about how to spell their names in Japanese, so I just put Godfathers Pizza's address because I was getting frustrated about expired coupons.