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My friend Cynthia came up on a sweet stretch

  • My friend Cynthia came up on a sweet stretch limo that'd had a small fire in the passenger compartment. She patched it up and rode around town in it, dominating the scene. Last

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  • time, she was in the gutter. But with her new limo, she transformed into a celebrity. Cynthia pulled me into the back. "Fasten your seat belt, it's going to be a bumpy ride!"

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  • By the time we pulled up to The Shangri-La Motel & Casino in her limo, I was bruised all over. Cynthia too, but she couldn't feel a thing, she was so wasted. We were met by two

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  • animals who'd claimed to gotten here by a giant boat made by some dude in the desert. Me and Cynthia were not about to let these two bonobos in the hotel room with us.

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  • They were used to sleeping in close quarters with various species. We, on the other hand, were not. Cynthia bolted the doors and windows. We were awoken by bonobos cries at 2

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  • am... The door was off the hinges and Bonobos were throwing around our backpacks, drinking from our bottles.. One of them, the ugly one with the scar, was getting close to Cynthia

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  • "Cynthia NOOO!" I cried as the drunk Bonobos surrounded her. The ugly one with the scar began prodding her ferociously. I resolved to save her. "Here I come!" I announced and

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  • immediately regretted it. Details aside, my infraction with the drunk Bonobos put me into Cynthia's favor and she visited me in the hospital everyday until she was charmed away by

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  • my magnetic eccentricity & sparkling wit. It didn't hurt that she could now flit around the hospital room & nurse me back to health. But as long as I finally have her attention, I

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  • would be just F.I.N.E. fine. "Here's your pills," she said, handing them to me. I took them. "You know I'm your Number One fan, don't you?" she added. Suddenly, I was in misery.

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