The President apparently had no idea that

The President apparently had no idea that thousands, perhaps millions had been slaughtered by his forces. "Well, hi-de-ho, then," he exulted in a remarkably brief press conf

usion, fingering his mustache, pencil thin under chiclet grins, his feet stuttering as the orchestra tooted and blatted and honked. "I got a heart as big as a whale, hi-de-ho!"

he sang. Accompanied by the toots, blats and honks of the orchestra. He forgot his words just as they reached the chorus, which was lucky because right then

a band of geese, sidetracked from their southern flight, walked straight into the auditorium. Amidst shrill honks and quacks, they filed down the two aisles as the singer

began her warm ups. A trill here, a construction of silly nonspeak with vibrato there. The geese were particularly attracted to the last bit of vocal gymnastics and started

squawking at her, saying "SQUA SQUEE," (which means "Encore" in Geese), but the signer misunderstood & thought they wanted food. So she stopped singing, which made the geese angry

and they came after her, mouths open to bite her. She filled those mouths with breadcrumbs, which made the geese happy. But when they were full, she stuffed them into her oven and

threatened to roast them if they didn't start laying golden eggs. The geese gathered to gaggle about taking a gander of the rigging underpinning the floor joists. One bawked at hav

ing to kill the bastard themselves, but what else could the geese do? Damaging the floor joists was it. They made cuts below, piled golden eggs on the weakened floor, and waited.