Twas the night before Christmas, and all
- Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the castle not a creature was stirring, not even the shackled; the skeletons wre hung, by the chimney with care, in the hopes that
- Satan Claus soon would be there. The orphans were huddled for warmth in their beds, while visions of maniacs danced in their heads. And Mummy in her tatters, and I in my hood, had
- just settled our brains for a long winter's nap. When down in the cellar there arose such a shriek, I sprang from my coffin to snatch a quick peek! Away to the stairwell, I flew
- like a bat, and splatted against the wall like a gnat. The people upstairs were trying the door. I gathered myself on the stairs for their horror. The stairwell's dim bulb did sput
- nik impressions & I screamed in demented Russian to the people upstairs that I swore on Rasputin's pickled penis I was not a bat murderer. Au contraire, that my fraternal love for
- Count Dracula and at least 2/3 of the Cullen family would prevent me from ever committing a violent crime against anything with fangs and the ability to echolocate. Therefore,
- I can clearly not go down that path. Learning Battish was my only alternative. That was not an alternative I wished to consider further but every way I figured I always wound up th
- At way. Expect the unexpected, this was my motto. Battish had an interesting alphabet and punctuation. Plus accent marks similar to Vietnamese. I had a notebook ready to practise.
- My Battish improved daily. soon I would be able to communicate with bats everywhere and then balls. One day a stray bat and ball combo clobbered me for learning the secrets of
- the game. "Balls are so re-tarred. And any fan knows that balls get a mud bath and massage beforehand." I wondered why the ball was all up in my face. Suddenly it hit me.
- Started
- 2014-12-16 03:22:59
- Finished
- 2016-09-30 21:17:03
5 Comments
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SlimWhitman Oct 01 2016 @ 17:45
Nice timing, started this before Christmas just shy of two years ago, and Halloweens' skulking around the corner.
PurpleProf Oct 01 2016 @ 18:04
Love the ending, Foldmeonce!
foldmeonce Oct 02 2016 @ 18:58
Thanks, PurpleProf! I like the different take on the holiday poem. It reminds me of that Tim Burton movie...
LordVacuity Oct 02 2016 @ 21:06
Yeah, Edward Scissorshands.
SlimWhitman Oct 14 2016 @ 19:30
Here a link to more Holiday cheer Thanksgiving http://foldingstory.com/lyz4y/