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"Ipswich is the last stop on this line,"

  • "Ipswich is the last stop on this line," chortled the conductor. " Never anybody gets off there. Last I heard the Adicts were all gone. Disappeared just
  • before the Tories took over. Some say that's beyond coincidence and that they themselves must have been the Tories." "Well" said Nigel from the back of the bus "This is my stop."
  • Nigel was such a smug ass. He glided off the bus. It made me think of the Headmaster in Nervingshire, and my skimpy scholastic performance. Nigel, I hated him. He will pay.
  • Nigel. Even his name made me hate him. Nigel. Prick. Nigel. Look at me! I'm. Nigel. The next time I saw him. Nigel. I was going to show everyone what a fake he was.
  • Who even named their kid Nigel? that was just asking for trouble, Nigel is such a dodgy assed name.. I mean sure, it sounds fancy and well educated but you're wrong in fact it is a
  • weirdly Australian/New Zealander sounding name. Not that there's anything wrong with Australia or New Zealand. The name Nigel really just irks me. But that has nothing to do
  • with... I kind of just drifted off then--into my happy place where no-one can get to me. I was rudely shaken awake by Nigel. "Fair do's mate," he said, "but I'm cracking a fat here
  • . Would you mind giving my lap a rest?" Nigel said. I pretended to be asleep and groaned softly. He reached up and shoved me off. I said, "Hey! What's the big idea?"
  • Nigel sat up in bed. "That is an excellent question. What IS the big idea? Hmm..." Nigel was such a passive aggressive jerk-butt. Sure, I used him for his lap, but that's the only
  • thing he was good for since he sat on his ass procrastinating all the time. I was sick of his sarcasm. I am small, fuzzy and adorable. And the world is full of laps. To hell w/you

4 Comments

  1. Gibber Jul 02 2014 @ 02:20

    Oops, I don't mean YOU it should be "him"

  2. lucielucie Jul 02 2014 @ 14:14

    I looked up Australian expressions & 'cracking a fat' made me laugh so much I had to find a way of inserting it into my fold... as it were.

  3. foldmeonce Jul 04 2014 @ 16:37

    @lucielucie - When I looked it up, it made me laugh, too. Good one!

  4. lucielucie Jul 05 2014 @ 05:03

    figjam

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