The tiger loped through the high jungle,

  • The tiger loped through the high jungle, only a smattering of sunlight reaching through the thick canopy to land on his striped (pronounced stripe-ed) hide. She stopped when she

  • saw a large evil zebra giving her the "How ya' doin'?" look. She was pissed of that her prey was hitting on her, so she lunged and ripped his throat out, just as he

  • was ordering "sex on the beach" for the both of them. His neck spray coated the entire bar. A drunk at the end thought the bar tender had poured grenadine in his screwdriver and

  • incendiaried his ballpeen with a cattle prod up the allen wrench. The mixologist missiled up a scissors then machine-gunned another pliers to go with the stabbed duct tape for the

  • grand finale.... and missed. He staggered back to his workbench, frantically searched for his sandpaper to give his chainsaw the extra edge. Just in time, he looked up and saw the

  • Masked creep point the shop vac hose towards him. He dropped the dull-edged chain saw and grasped the first thing in his toolkit that came to hand,

  • which happened 2B a hot pink Sharpie. "Don't make me use this!" he whaled. "Don'tcome any closer!" The masked creep did not listen, He lunged at the creep and drew the monocle

  • around his eye. He started to giggle and said "You look like the monopoly man." The creep replied, "indeed, it is odd weather to be wearing a top hat."

  • With that, he tipped his hat, waved adieu and went on his way. Little did he know that that it was not her that had his strawberries, but it was me. It was me the entire time!

  • The strawberry shortcake I had later was extra sweet. Revenge makes a great dessert.



  1. jaw2ek Oct 04 2012 @ 22:27

    A great battle ending in...strawberries? Hmmmm.

  2. Zetawilk Oct 05 2012 @ 02:00

    Make cake, not war!

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!