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"The future of advertising is within!" announced

  • "The future of advertising is within!" announced Senator Wayward Conquest as he strutted during his TED talk. "We can make everyone sleek, healthy, long-lived consumers with our ge
  • felta fish." Then Senator Wayward Conquest's TED talk went super wonky. He yelled, "delirium, delirium" into the mic and undid his belt.
  • The crowd went wild, but not in a good way. They began pelting the Senator with rotten fruit (available at the door for only a small fee), sending him scurrying offstage where
  • he suddenly had a vision of everyone drowning. But then his vision was interrupted by his assistant checking to see if he was okay. The poor old Senator said he was fine but
  • that he was going to take a break from the campaign trail for a while, perhaps forever. His assistant, puzzled, distressed and just the right amount of crazy, slapped the senator
  • And pulled a dead rabbit out of his hat. "This is your future, Senator!" He shrieked, disembowelling the rabbit and putting its intestines on a nearby door. He donned a IRS oufit
  • went to work like every other day. Except that not every day did he eviscerate a live rabbit in front of a Senator and tell that was his future. He had blood on his soles. The IRS
  • (International Rabbit Society) took him to trial and sent him to prison for nine years for unnecessary violence towards a lapine being. That ended his work in the Senate. From
  • his prison cell, he wrote the first-person 90,000-page almanac, Harvey, and Me. Each page unwrapping the evolving bond between a 6-foot-4-inch white rabbit and the former Senator.
  • Little did they know, the book was really a ruse to fill my cell with paper to start a fire. Only 10,000 more pages until the guards have to deliver supplies again. Almost time...
Started
2014-10-08 18:48:07
Finished
2020-04-25 22:05:12

4 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Jimbeau Apr 26 2020 @ 02:16

    An ending that might have made Ray Bradbury smile.
  2. Avatar

    Jimbeau Apr 26 2020 @ 02:20

    But, my rabbit reference was too weak, for the rabbit died in the end; up in flames, imaginary or not.
  3. Avatar

    LordVacuity Apr 26 2020 @ 02:25

    Instead of Shrödinger’s cat we’ll have Jimbeau’s cat.
  4. Avatar

    Woab Apr 26 2020 @ 15:03

    Jimbeau's rabbit, you mean! Good ending, Tweedlenoodl!

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