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I knew I wasn’t going to get far so I drove

  • I knew I wasn’t going to get far so I drove two miles down the road and then off into an old factory road that had been abandoned for ten years. There was a bar blocking the way,

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  • a sign nailed to a tree states, Private Property, trespassers would be shot on sight. By whom he wondered. I don't believe

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  • trees should be private property. I mean, they grow by themselves, nobody owns them. I decided to carry on & climbed a barbed wire

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  • fence, too distracted by my mission to realize one of the barbs had snagged my pants and ripped the crotch out of my retro acid-wash jeans. The ripping sound was drowned out by the

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  • by the chain saw that the nice man in the leather mask was waving at me. He seemed to want to cut the barbed wire so I could get free. I smiled at him and said, "Thanks" and lifted

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  • my arms. As I was getting up another gentleman wearing a blood stained hockey mask came up and indicated that he'd like to chop some firewood. I had just had sex and done drugs so

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  • i needed a shower and tried to bring the blood-stained gentleman with me. He then morphed into one of those wax-covered string toys also known as

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  • Yo-yo. The german taxi driver laughed and said "That is a childrens toy". Yo-yo didn't take kindly to people laughing at his name

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  • but really, he was named after a fad. How mad could he get that the Berliner made fun of him for something that was silly in every language? He paid the driver and got out in

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  • plenty of time to walk into the theatre, onto the stage, and claim his prize. Disco Jones had earned his Nobel, and Berliner be damned, he would take it.

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