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In November of 1878, long after it had been

  • In November of 1878, long after it had been thought lost at sea, the Turtle of the Baskervilles
  • , black resplendent turtle of fear, was found scratching around the body of some smarmy Baronet in a manicured garden outside a stuffy manor. The Turtle of the Baskervilles
  • at the prize-winning Orchid and dove to the bottom of the pond. The Turtle of the Baskervilles was a botanical serial killer. He'd killed more lilies than Stalin killed
  • fillies. So the fillies & the lillies emigrated to Siberia, which if you ask my coworkers, goes by a different name. I like flora & fauna, but forget it. The Turtle of Baskervilles
  • was just fillibustering vigilantly. He'd lull his victims with his stealthy rhyming prose and then wham! He'd strike. The Turtle of Baservilles had roamed the loamy bogs gloamily
  • when he saw the paw prints of a lawless hound. The Turtle of the Baskervilles sought the author of these monstrous imprints in a lonely inn on a tump on the blasted heath on a squa
  • lid wasteland. How he arrived at this inn is not important. What is important is that he discovered the lawless, feral hound lying in a corner, licking the remains of Sir Hugo's
  • hunting shotgun. As a hound, it had no opposable thumbs to wipe with a cloth. He got the canine to confess. 'Life in the wasteland,' the hound said, 'has been kind of... ruff.'
  • "Don't believe me," Said the hound. "Try living there for a week. Just a week and tell me, you wouldn't do the same." I pulled the shotgun away from his face and sat down to drink
  • a beer with him...and I listened, really listened. I changed that day. I changed forever. That's how my career with PETA began and how that hound became my best friend.
Started
2011-07-14 16:02:18
Finished
2015-09-17 21:49:24

5 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Chaz Sep 18 2015 @ 00:38

    "Slowly I turned... step by step..." - The Three Stooges
  2. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Sep 18 2015 @ 13:39

    Funny how we begin with the Turtle of the Baskervilles and end with the Hound of the Baskervilles.
  3. Avatar

    lucielucie Oct 02 2015 @ 15:38

    I wrote that fold at the Lion Inn on the North Yorkshire moors on holiday and it did feel like a blasted heath.
  4. Avatar

    LordVacuity Jan 02 2018 @ 17:24

    Winning Story and winning comments.
  5. Avatar

    BlastedHeath Jan 04 2018 @ 21:35

    Dear Lucie, Cheers!

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