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I watch TV and hear the click-click-click

  • I watch TV and hear the click-click-click of our whippet's nails as she patrols between kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, and living room and back again. Then the clicking stopped.
  • I hit "mute" on the TV and looked round. What the hell was that do...he was standing right beside my chair, looking straight into my eyes. "Steve", she said, "we need to talk."
  • Oh God. It was the "Steve, we need to talk" spiel again. I sighed and put down the remote, all the while keeping a peripheral eye on Kentucky vs. Wisconsin. "Now what?" I asked.
  • "I'm feeling lonely even though we are in the same room. How are you feeling about us?" I just about lost it! The game is on, I hid it so well, "I'm feeling great, badger...um I
  • had an affair last week. And a different one the week before. And so on really, but at least it's never long with the same guy. That's ok with you, right Badger?" She said. Badger
  • ! I hate it when she calls me Badger, but she was just baiting me, and I wasn't biting. I said, "Oh, sure love. Just be sure to use proper protection. You know the humane society
  • is only a phone call away, but you still need to be careful." "I've had my shots," she protested but put on her protective suit and leather gloves. "All set Badger. Open the door."
  • Badger opened the door and in came his family. The wife, the cousins and the little badgers just growing their teeth. She stared at them for a minute until they said, "Auntie!'
  • Badger made a vague gesture towards the back of the warren and rushed into the kitchen, presumably to fetch drinks. The intruding family looked at each other, puzzled. "I smell Aun
  • t Wanda...nobody smells like Aunt Wanda...sour milk, sour tangerine, lard, and, well...just plan old B.O. "Say, listen, if your fetching drinks," someone said. "I'll have cognac!"

3 Comments

  1. Jimbeau Mar 10 2017 @ 21:25

    Okay...so...do I get a break? I used your instead of you're because I ran out of character spaces...181...181...181...181...

  2. SlimWhitman Mar 11 2017 @ 01:14

    If you were looking for space, a few less full stops would have done the trick. but that's not so important - it was a nice finish!

  3. Chaz Mar 11 2017 @ 07:11

    Gender roles, species, and perspectives all over the place, brilliant!

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