It was a dark and stormy night

It was a dark and stormy night

tornadoes full of harpoons, from the panzer sharks to the shuriken sandstorms, from the tabasco river to the outbreak of kung-fu dementia, it was all my doing and I'll be goddamned

to finish the entire blue print of my WDP (World Domination Plan.) I stapled the last piece of construction paper on the basement fiberboard wall. "There. Now for lunch."

But after a nice smoked Gouda avocado focaccia sandwich I returned to the basement & my world domination plan was missing! "Who has access to the basement den besides me?" I asked

Before I realised I was talking to myself. Maybe moms basement wasn't the best place to plot world domination. Harold must have stole his plans, that bearded bastard must die.

Harold was my step-dad. I never called him dad. Even though he called me Pal and drove a Forrester. I used to dream of pluning a barbecue fork into that doughy white lump he

keeps telling me is a wart. Wart my ass. Warts aren't the size of goddamned golf balls; I know he's hiding something. Harold's never told me anything; he's so fake and plastic,

almost like a real-life Barbie doll. Come to think of it, he even acts like one. 'Oh, I can't go out tonight, Susie, I have to get a perm.' What kind of guy gets a perm? Seriously.

"All right. You do that," I awkwardly laughed, turning around to head for the door. I soon realized that he had become a true Barbie-Ken doll. It kinda reminded me of Mannequin...