Ted's senior year was marked by an Evil Teacher.

Ted's senior year was marked by an Evil Teacher. This Evil Teacher bedeviled and tormented Ted, but was also a blessing in disguise.

You may ask why he was a blessing. Did this Evil Teacher drive Ted to do better out of sheer spite? Not quite. To take away the pain of teacher torment, Ted partied so hard that he

forgot himself, and in a drug-induced haze, actually began to study out of sheer dopiness. The so-called evil professor kept him grounded from floating into the land of no return,

and then a glowing sigil affixed him to the flowing moment and eternity betides. "Dr. Johnson, I'm sorry, but I think I should leave your class. Thank you for your help." He left t

he class, flying away on a golden motorcycle into the sunset, leaving rainbows and magic in his wake. Little did Dr. Johnson know that the rainbows in the sky above him were the

portals to Samsara, where the three sisters of Attachment, Ignorance, and Malice lay in wait. Dr. Johnson believed himself just one final step from enlightenment, but in fact

was 4,172,399,802,490 steps from fixing to get ready to start on the path to enlightenment. The 3 sisters maliciously attached themselves to him. "Hey, Dr. Johnson. Come watch TV

's Greatest Wardrobe Failures with us!" Beguiled by the the 3 sisters' peculiar charms, Dr. Johnson failed to notice that they were in fact the 3 Fates. They sat him on the couch

and dumped some sewing equipment in his lap before running off giggling. Dr Johnson picked up a thread and whimsically snipped with the scissors. A man on the street dropped dead a

moment before that, and Dr. Johnson didn't make the connection until his cross-stitch didn't take and his pants fell comically to the ground. Ironically, she was a size nine.