30

And that was that. Somehow we had managed

  • And that was that. Somehow we had managed to escape from that angry man storming toward us. Now his ghoulish stare will forevermore be
  • henceforth and forthwith a forthright foulfright. The former lawyer was now an ambulance chasing ghoul. He shambled towards us. "You need representation?" he moaned.
  • We started incredulously at the Shyster. "You were just hit by the ambulance you were chasing! You're the one that needs help!" "You don't understand", he said, but then puked all
  • over my shoes. "Oh, you are so sick, get your drunk self away from me and my baby!" The Shyster didn't even know how embarrassed he should be. "You call yourself a defense attor
  • ey's paralegal?" The Shyster puked on my baby's head. "No, I'm a defense attorney's secretary." My baby cried angrily. "Sir, you don't want to see my baby get angry. You won't
  • like it." The Shyster sneered. "Your baby gonna kick my ass?" He poked my baby. "So you think you're tough baby? Does that rattle make you tough? Huh? You a tough little baby-man?"
  • The Shyster woke up in the hospital with a broken jaw, bruised ribs, & severely lacerated buttocks. "Damn!" He thought. "That baby DID kick my ass!" The Shyster called his agent.
  • "Jerry, I think we've got our man--- er, baby." "Shyster, I thought we talked about this. That part of our relationship is over." "NO I mean, I think I have my new bodyguard!!"
  • The baby bodyguard wobbled unsteadily due to the pistol stuck in the left side of his diaper. He menacingly chewed on a pair of handcuffs.He was the right person for the job becaus
  • e he looked so cute & innocent, with his lil' cowlick sticking up & the way he'd gurgle "goo-goo, ga-ga." He was the best in the business, they said.After what I saw, I believe it.
Started
2012-05-01 00:46:49
Finished
2014-07-07 16:20:34

2 Comments

  1. Avatar

    m80 Jul 07 2014 @ 23:13

    Please, more ass-kicking-baby-hero stories! Nice job with the baby heckling, Gibber.
  2. Avatar

    Gibber Jul 08 2014 @ 00:29

    Thanks! I was inspired by a movie I saw ages ago where a big bully intimidates a guy. The movie, oddly enough, was "My Bodyguard."

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