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*Ding dong* "Oh, hi Hubert. What sort of

  • *Ding dong* "Oh, hi Hubert. What sort of halloween costume is that?" "Is it a stock broker? Is it a church warden? Is it a quantity surveyor? No! It's bicycle repairman!" "I see...
  • you are in need of an adjustment" Hubert said with a wink "let me get my tool". Hubert's wife loved the new role play games. Ever since they went to marriage counselling Hubert
  • was much more adventurous in the bedroom. She waited, writhing patiently, for Hubert to "get his tool." He came back wearing his leopard skin Speedos and a chain saw. "Ready?"
  • "More ready than I'll ever be" she replied, trying to hide her excitement. He slowly starrted revving up his chainsaw, whilst skillfully shedding his Speedos. "Lets do this!"
  • But she was unfazed. She was Sandy. A ghetto chick and she'd seen it all four times already, surviving pretty much on crumbs and pimp dendritis. So the chainsaw and speedo thing
  • wasn't going to work like it did last time. She went on a long journey to find her inner-self, but she ended up finding a strange old man in a speedo, mumbling under his beard.
  • This caused a crisis which she has yet to emerge from. We think our inner selves are childlike gorgeous creatures. When we discover how crusty, derelict & repellent they are we can
  • only shudder in silent revulsion. She rubbed her hands together frantically, hoping to rub away the imaginary flecks of dirt, spots of dry blood that existed only in her head.
  • There was no service on the brown and purple lines to and from downtown.
  • this one is done
Started
2012-12-07 07:09:55
Finished
2014-11-21 22:39:58

9 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Gibber Nov 23 2014 @ 17:05

    That's a rather deep characterization of Hubert's wife, Sandy. Speaking of wives, a search returns 502 folds with "wife" but only 173 with "husband." Is there some gender bias here? And if so, which way? Are women portrayed as merely wives, or is there a paucity of husbands?
  2. Avatar

    Gibber Nov 23 2014 @ 17:32

    More food for thought, the Foldingstory food pyramid: dairy product 4, junk food 14, grain 34, fats & oils 44, meat 296, fruits & vegetables 312, pie 960
  3. Avatar

    lucielucie Nov 24 2014 @ 14:29

    I noticed that there were't a lot of stories written from the point of view of female characters or a female first person narrator so I try to do that when I start a story. As far as I can tell there are more male writers on this site than female which surprised me because I always thought women like to write more. Maybe I'm wrong about that. As to pies, I suppose pies are inherently comic food which is why clowns use them. Sausages came in at 128 as well.
  4. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Nov 24 2014 @ 17:27

    banana 201 donut 87 pumpkin 60 twinkie 39 hot pocket 22 watermelon 20 kumquat 5 surströmming 3 (all my your's truly) I think you're right about the ratio of male/female protagonists.I'm going to write more folds from the female point of view. That's one of the nice things about FS. You can try mnay different points of view.
  5. Avatar

    Gibber Nov 24 2014 @ 21:52

    Someone told me the three funniest things are monkeys, pies and pants. Monkey: 217 pants: 444 compared to elephant: 139 shirt: 272
  6. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Nov 24 2014 @ 22:50

    http://foldingstory.com/0tjrk/ and here I just said i'd write more stories from a female viewpoint - old patterns are hard to break.
  7. Avatar

    Gibber Nov 25 2014 @ 01:59

    Whoops, me too. I made the monkey male.
  8. Avatar

    lucielucie Nov 25 2014 @ 05:02

    Your attempts to get in touch with your feminine sides remind me of this story: http://foldingstory.com/iixzy/ccabkb/
  9. Avatar

    lucielucie Nov 26 2014 @ 13:09

    http://foldingstory.com/54tj9/ This is an inspiring thread...

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