39 Folds
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to his intelligence, the riddle was too much for him. "What are mythical birds that rise from ashes, Alex?" "This isn't Jeopardy, Butt-Man," the sphinx said, and ate him. -
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bear performance art (forgetting to don his bear costume) at the mall, showering innocent bystanders with kitty litter & sugar, while clanging the shovel against the petrified man.
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"It is I," giggled Undead Gibber as he inexpertly manipulated the marionette strings, making him stumble around like a bumbling fool.
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had seen in a YouTube video that 90% of name-brand food products are poisoned to thin the herd of sheeple by shriveling the reproductive organs. The semi-digested Triscuits in her
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istas would use guerrilla tactics until the style consultants' propaganda of repeated lies subjugated the masses: Zoot suits are back in style. Leather is for losers. Mauve is the
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her magic 8-ball. "Ask again later." "Who punched you in the eye!" "The principal." I said. Astonished, the school nurse looked at me. "Punch him back." I was beginning to think
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clean of the crusty buildup of mucus and adderall. "Those people out there are losers. Use real bullets. And Kayleigh - announce I've won the election. People will believe you."
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Ziti hid a week later when the girl scouts invaded the small island nation, overthrew, decapitated, stuffed & mounted the Big Lizard as a warning to all who do not heed warnings.
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Her ridiculously simple plan had worked, as she knew it would. "Men," she sneered to herself, "pathetic."
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from a perpendicular universe clutching my temporal oscillator which vibrated in time but not in spatial dimensions. He remained wildly unsatisfied after applying it to his person.
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's headless, limbless torso. The judge was visibly offended and sent the little guy back to jail, where he promptly ate his hat. This is the perfect illustration of how a little
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another one, and she flung it towards me. "Hakamo-san, are you okay?" Saiki asked worriedly. "I'll be fine. It's just a burning tree," I said as I jumped aside, dodging the fire.
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my tea onto the floor. I don't know what provoked him, but one of them took offence. "That's so f'ing rude, man!" he barked. "You should be apologizing to the people sitting here!"
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watched myself embrace her decapitated corpse, and heard a voice not unlike my own wail in what sounded like unbearable anguish. The vibration of her humming corpse pulled me into
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kept busy convincing the dieing newcomers crawling in from worse places to die that where they had come from wasn't so bad and Dark Matter Corridor 458 wasn't the best. Heyman Boyd
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the name went through a rapid misnomification to W. Umbra, Warm Umbrella, Raw Umber, Pen Umbra, and finally Underwirebra, Pennsylvania. Now everyone wanted to live there, but it
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"I guess that answers that question," he chuckled. The now deceased, pulp headed Trump once again lost the popular vote but won the election. Strangely, the brainless corpse didn't
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melt when, as if they had read my mind, they claimed they were very concerned with my bikini lines & insisted on examining them. The Tropic Tan counter people's dripping faces
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erased what had happened. Then Goofy was erased. "What happened?" asked Minnie. Mickey looked confused then started screaming as he was slowly erased. Then the room was erased.
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ort one to a KFC also located in the same Taco Bell. It was so disappointing. So I put the slippers in a velvet lined display case where they maintained an air of wonder & mystery.