3 Folds
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4to try it out while on a surfing trip in Iran. Before being sent to prison and having his hands removed, Bob's towel-snapping research uncovered an amazing scientific breakthrough:
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7Out my window and across the street, a still black figure caught my eye amidst the grey-green midnight shadow of the bushes - I stared, dreading what I would decipher; dreading
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3After forty hours on my feet, lying down made my brain geyser out of my ear and leave a pink stain as it cascaded down the bedroom wall. I was flying at a 35 degree angle through
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4old limey Brit during the 1700's. Sure, the hipsters would dig it, but his girlfriend? She liked Weezer, but she also listened to Justin Bieber. Even now she could be packing her
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9prickly pear, it's a sea urchin!" but it was too late, Mallory already had the turgescence of a tetraodontidae. "Stop thinking nerd thoughts and help me!"
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11"Yukon gold! Nuggets as big as your fists! Yeehaw!" he said. We immediately took a hard right and canoed to Nova Scotia. Cold as a witches teet it was, but we had nowhere else to
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2, no bed, no sleep, make Homer something something. "Go crazy?" asked the Lunesta Moth. "No" said Homer, and then I woke up. Too much Lunesta had made me
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13his future as a superstar Folder seemed to dwindle with every passing second. "You can still finish this, just concentrate!" a faint voice in his epilepsy-wracked brain told him.
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7it. "In the game of frostbite, you win... or you lose all your extremities. There is no middle ground" my doctor used to say. What a quack. I turned back to my disembodied tongue &
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3black as the celebrities from whence her name may hence be born, copyright laws permitting. Yar har har!" "Sir?" squeaked the first mate "Isn't that a little politically incorrect?
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3"Yeah, I asked if you were BILL Nye, ya ignoramus!" Bill crossed his arms and glowered. "Ah quit yer' belly achin', sonny, n' hand me one of them flux capacitors before I
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6Found, his own original screenplay. "I, uhh- uh... Milton was a twat?" "That's more like it!" he bellowed, smacking me across the face with the screenplay again. "W-what was that
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5knees. "At least it isn't as bland as that God-awful soylent green!" he said, wiping the final tears from his eyes and standing back up. "Well, I feel better. I sure could go for a
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5like ripe tomatoes. "Chill bruh" he said while tossing another tub of the white stuff aside, "it's lactose free ice cream, bro." My eyes widened. "Whaaaat? Tell me all about it!"
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7the ones that had heralded judgement day. But later that day, the asteroid burned down to the size of a toilet and knocked over a statue of Ron Howard. Awkward silence permeated
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2Even though I'd just become a superhero, my arch-nemesis CatManDon't was ready with a spray bottle. "Hiss!" I shouted glibly -- I'd have to get used to being a cat later. "Not so
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3I'd spent at least four minutes making bird puns. Now these pitch-perfect partridges of prey were really gonna get my goat... wait, that doesn't make any sen-- oh God not the face!
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6Proselessia, where the sun is always shining and everyone speaks and writes as if they were all dropped on their heads as children. Yes, now that my leg is gone, life will be
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4inflated and glowed when it spotted prey. "I'll marry that fish or die trying" I whispered as I dove into the Mariana Trench. 1000 atmospheres of pressure wouldn't come between
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6Connor shook her head. "Yer a daft bloody bird-brain's what you are!" Dr. Pitt turned to stare at her quizzically. "That's not even a real Irish accent. Get out of my office. "