129 Folds
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I could make sure he knows how much I don’t care. That is all I care about, really. Sooo… Do you think he’s over at Rodney’s? Because that’s where he goes to -
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do but reluctantly pull on her little plaid school uniform. “Fine!” she cried, pigtails bobbing in rage. “I’ll show you! I’LL SHOW ALL OF YOU!” Twelve years later,
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e, I giggled as we swirled around the toilet bowl, delirious in our joy, gleeful in our guilt, waving goodbye forever as we escaped the awful ordeal.
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Slowly, without breaking eye contact with him, she put down the knife…and picked up the fork.
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the garden, so to speak, yes, right there and then! By the next morning, the meat garden had bloomed: fingers, knees, elbows, and even one buttock emerged. Interior's exterior.
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she leapt from the precipice with abandon, her cape billowing behind her like the super-hero she truly was. She sped through the clouds, knowing she'd someday have to return.
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, which was OK because (honestly) I needed it consistently to reinforce my negative self-concept. My thoughts wandered back to my father, who was responsible for this whole mess.
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I rolled over on my side, contemplating the half-eaten stale glazed donut and my now cold cup of coffee. "I gotta get to class, I guess," I told myself. So I did.
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She sat completely still, blood dripping from her eyes. "You did this to me," she accused. Mike was aghast. It was the ghost of his great Aunt Valetta. The joke was on him.
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I heard an odd whirring sound and...and then suddenly I found myself here, twenty years later, and I don't know Jack Squat.
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you are an innocent party to this, this twisted, turbulent, turgid tale? I could have acknowledged my shortcomings right then, but I had other tasks on my to-do list to complete.
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finger. So, I decided to give it to them. "$#*%!*% YOU!" I screamed into their surprised, well-groomed faces. Maxfield's gigilos misunderstood entirely my outburst. Gliding over
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fee mugs, billboards. "I am nothing now!!" she screamed into the black hole that was her Self. Eons passed & she, unable to reflect on her circumstances, remained stoic. Suddenly
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Ah, life was very good for a few years. Until one day... Kim Jon Un found him, finally, his face dangerously serene. "You sold out." he said (in Korean). "And now you must pay."
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I felt her ice-cold toes dig into my back just then. DAMMIT!! I closed my eyes again, hoping, but...DAMMIT!! My adventure had disappeared. Woodenly, I rose from the bed disgusted
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Crushed, betrayed, and bewildered, Nigel stumbled into the night, dragging his blankie behind him. We never saw Nigel again. Christmas is a bittersweet day for us even today.
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e wantin' to get to the tractor pull before 7, so let's just fergit this whole ordeal, git us a coupla beers and a funnel cake and have a helluva time. So that's what we did.
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with the waffle (for the mystique) & a jar of maraschino cherries to top me all off. "Oh boyohboyohboy, is Ralph going to be surprized!" I inwardly squealed. My sexy sundae
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swung hisself up on Bert's Boneyass. The 3 of them plodded off into the sunset, realizin' another lesson learnt & thinkin' about t'morrow. Bert farted contentedly.
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, diced him, smothered, & covered him with grilled onions & melted swiss. And then I ate all of him. Yes, that's right. I ATE VERN & I am not sorry! Well, I wasn't until my stomach