0 Folds
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8
Other reviewers failed to even notice me wallowing in my cesspool of ineptitude and mediocrity. "This is my fault" I admitted, staring in the mirror at my shitty pantomime rags. -
5
"Let's flood it with pictures of your family then!" interrupted a manly voice from the heavens. Everyone laughed for 40 days & 40 nights pausing only to eat their mashed banana.
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4
"Do you pilot an ark or do you captain it?" Noah asked a zebra. "Generally you captain it as a maritime vessel." The zebra said. "What about this sleigh?" The zebra look pissed.
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6
cacophony of tedious wordiness drowned out the fun. People waited, hoping the event horizon would silence the drone of the bizarre diatribe and its penchant for peculiarity. I
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3
that it was any of our business... still the desire to ask the worst kind of questions burned stronger than ever and I was determined to annoy at all cost with my meta-bullshit so
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2
calmed down and helped Jeeves clean up. "Sorry for covering you in hydrafloric acid Jeeves, we all got too excited because we're juvenile." They dashed over to the TV, WWE was on
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3
to him. He was anally retentive and the idea of a newcomer on his turf made him pull out all his big words like a weirdo. He hit the dictionary looking for weapons. "Aha!" this
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4
change anything. Then the mafia had a moment of quiet reflection which they often did away from the public. They realized their stupidity and went back to their old school ways
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3
one didn't seem to care. Nobody did. It was like the whole question sounded like the muted cries of a helpless monkey drowning in a ferocious sea of apathy. His addled mind
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0
Methadone.. The heroine substitute. Look I'm a smackhead who read a psychology book once. I like to sound informed but most of what I say is pseudo-intellectual waffle. I suck
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2
But nobody listened. Instead a special commission was set up to resurrect tired sitcoms of the 1980's with a view to remaking them with current C-List celebs. It was a victory
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0
although Jason and his bigot friends had absolute contempt for any such criticism and brutally gang-raped anyone they discovered professing them. Jason was really
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4
contemplating the world of observational comedy and wondering if anyone really knew about creepy Russian numbers stations or whether he should rework some of his material. He left
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5
Although I am an American Swampthing I like to defecate on a British loo. Just a habit of mine. I pondered my nationality before rising to
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1
Although the Teletubbies had long been silent since Ragdoll productions had turned their talents to making In The Night Garden. He contemplated the gravity of his enormous error.
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1
bit, like the bit that goes in a horses mouth. He was saddled up and ready. There had to be an easier way to pay his college fees, he pondered. Suddenly Jenson dropped the trowel
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3
or Trumpet Lecter as he became known in showbiz circles fumbled around on the floor, milking every last chortle out of his hilarity glands before ultimately dying.
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6
a laugh if nothing more. No laughter came. Hours past, still nothing. Squeezing a laugh out felt like passing an inordinate turd. I wept.
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3
he cashed in his chips and decided not broom-handle another clown into a round of 5-6-pick-up-sticks as it would leave precious little time left to bake meringues for chaps no?
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1
but so did a lot of shit these days and his recall was not what it was. Extracting and selling his memories for food seemed like a good idea at the time.