7 Folds
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was sitting in a juvy cell all day, so I had plenty of time to read them all. "Cuz I don't wanna" was a recurring theme. Did I really not wanna do that many things? I had to escape -
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Well, friends, I shouldn't have to tell you what happened next. That was the last we ever saw of him. But you know what? He went for it, and we can all learn from that.
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roast this weasel for a Saturday barbecue in the South! Sure, I've never had to stoop this low in the past, but I've never had a professor who was this short either. Maybe I'll
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Jim "I ain't never laughed" McGee, the perfect yin to the Clowns Without Borders' yang. Luckily for Bozo, the trial was being held in Kangaroo Court which was a serious
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Peace. It was like a miracle out of nowhere. If one listened closely, a prog band could be heard playing this totally killer organ melody in the distance. Sunset was approaching.
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of some combustible shorthand and failed to use it responsibly. With that, Captain Wrightblock and crew were washed ashore to Allegory Island, which was home to the most venomous
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But the good thing about useful idiots is that when you lose your hammer, they can take care of that nail for you. Using his forehead, I watched one build a house. Amazing!
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discovered the Theory of Everything. The proton pack's gauge went in the red, the dial looking as if it were trying to beat its way out. The whole thing exploded, along with our
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sped off. Lil J ran to the nearest police station and showed an officer the plate number. "Was this written with eyeliner pencil?" He asked. "Maybe. How would you know?"
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And that's what did happen. There was no time to celebrate. I had to cross 1000 miles through a barren wasteland in 4 hours on foot. This wasn't going to be easy. I saddled my
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Pleasure Planet, which was filled with nothing but topless Zorons and water slides. I was really looking forward to it, but upon descent, our thrusters malfunctioned, causing
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thrown apples at him. Once they began loading up broken wine bottles, Che became worried. He commanded a legion of lumberjacks to enter the Magic Forest and
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he rushed to the car, grabbed Donald's hair accidentally, and pulled. To his amazement he yanked out a tiny alien from his skull. "This is gonna be huuuuuuge," it said.
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However, those who fancy themselves as Super Packers ain't got nothing on Bernie Sanders when he whips it out with that toothy grin. They pay an average of $27 just to see it.
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an argantine-izomodine fuel mix of class 37 purity before they could power it up, but no one knew what that meant. The captain threw his hat on the table in exasperation and
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know, these people have no idea how to run a transit system," he said. The couple gathered what they had left of their worldly possessions and marched off the train like a
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That's when he noticed that, for the last half hour, his class was staring at him making weird hand motions in the air. A young wizard student raised his paw. Snape asked him what
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color human skin. "People aren't that color, STUPID!" Her brother yelled. She grimaced and pushed him away. "Not all people," she said, "Only the ones who are going to die."
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After those were gone, he ordered banana daiquiris for everyone. After all bananas were gone, he ordered rum and coke for everyone. After all the rum and coke was gone, he ordered
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by a potato again. One day, while Captain Egypt was polishing his sandstone boots, a fierce blizzard swept the barren landscape. Captain Egypt was a warm blooded creature so he