Finished Folds (201—220)
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7claiming it had been. No, the Presidency was too humble a target. I had a loftier goal: to become the Queen of Mars. But first, I'd need a rocket ship. I called up my pal Elon Musk
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7at bull-fighting, put profits above pursuing their dreams. "No bull-fighter ever became a millionaire," said Great Great Uncle Bert. "You gotta prioritise. And I want the cash."
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3bench ready to be served to the patrons. The vegetables only earned a measly pittance of $0.50 an hour. They'd had enough. The carrots started a union and encouraged everyone to
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4heir attempts to bribe the geese with soggy bread. The gaggle of geese watched the guards warily with beady, malicious eyes, as if they were daring the men to come closer.
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0was fast, faster than any creature Buzzella had encountered before. It gave an almighty roar, spitting out rotten air. Its eyes glowed red as it rumbled across the black earth.
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5ever be completely free of the smell of sheep dung ever again. Their woolly bodies packed the streets and spilled down through the subway system, blocking all vehicles in the city.
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3d me that I had to cut the cheese, or they'd kill my family!" I glanced down and saw that the knife tucked into his waistband was, indeed, a cheese knife. "Where are the crackers?"
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2crunched through the drywall and left gaping holes where the bullets pierced. The noise was explosive in the small room. I threw the gun away in horror and ran over to Dad's body.
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2mint condition Charizard from the Pokémon TCG Base Set. Well, zombies or no, I could sell this baby for at least $100 on eBay then buy my apocalypse survival gear with those funds.
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3Unfortunately, the workers were on strike and all online orders required at least a week to process. The overalls didn't arrive until it was far too late, and the worst happened.
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3the other required fire retarding safety gear. Really, he was woefully under-prepared for the dangers of fire season. "Smokey," said Winnie, "you really must look after yourself."
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2and die quietly. Wild animals never did - they kept fighting and searching and moving until the last breath left them. How did we humans lose those core survival instincts?
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4Luckily for the Russians, the zombie virus didn't cause the President's manly chest to atrophy, even as the rest of his shambling corpse continued to rot. It was too powerful.
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4ngles from measles, but it was easier to get a medical license back then. Little did I know, that fake license was the passport to all of my dreams coming true. The first thing I
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3if you can't beat them, join them. I took my gun out of my desk drawer and escaped into the disabled toilets. My hands shook as the cold metal nestled under my chin. BLAM!
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5Seven, eight, nine. I think we're running out of time. Ten, eleven, twelve. Into the rhyming depths we'll delve.
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6tinied. "These dogs are too small!" I bellowed. "We live on a farm! How is a Chihuahua going to herd sheep?" Sven looked taken aback. "Dey are so cute, da?" He offered me a puppy.
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2blood-sucking fiends!" I shouted. The girl scouts were undeterred by my pleas. The berets swarmed over my body like a tide of rats as I screamed like I was in a torture chamber.
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3sighed and looked at the pitiful toad. "I'm going to have to do things my own way." She reached into her royal armoire to produce a croquet mallet, then smashed the toad to death.
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3canister of industrial-grade spray adhesive. "Rosemary!" Jack spluttered, the oversized dentures clacking together. "Yes, Jack?" she asked as she popped the lid off the adhesive.