3 Folds
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I keep believing. If we don't believe in some mystical elf in a red jumpsuit, what point is there to living? Some years I just stare down the barrel of my rifle and wonder if -
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the archaeologist climbing up the side. "Bang, bang!" I said. The venom immediately blinded him. I didn't expect that to work. However as we careened down the track to the cliff
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native positioning service (NPS) that located displaced indigenous peoples, accurate within 100 yards. Unfortunately Thomas followed it too closely and we careened off a
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. . because I had a new favorite, Transylvanian cuisine! You've never really HAD blood sausage until you prepared it the way Vlad did. The things the man did with blood were
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about to explode! No!" I said as he attempted to pull away, "I mean like fireball explosion, not the other kind." He drove me to the military base where they got the bomb squad
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but I always figured that dresses and mustaches didn't go together. Especially when the policemen have to hike up the skirt for a footchase, they're not as methodical about shaving
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but after a few test runs, I don't think I could have lived without it. I ended up using it every day, often multiple times before bed. Though when I tried to use it at the office
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the fact that I had been drinking straight ammonia for the last five days. Did you know they used to distill ammonia from cat urine? The guys shooting at me didn't know that. They
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the fly had a gun! The bullet lodged in my chest and I collapsed onto the linoleum. I reached out shakily, only hearing screams. The fly pressed the gun against my skull. Only an
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trees growing upside down, war in small east European countries, HIV, death, hysterical pregnancy, juvenile diabetes and the apocalypse. To return this product, please call
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a wrecking bar (she had a big purse). As they came for her, she swung, deftly cracking skulls like birthday piñatas. Prizes in the form of sticky brain-leavings littered the
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Qickly, i oppened up MS Werd. The sergeuns wit teh help of teh new neral connnectors attached the spell checker directly into my head. It wasn't a perfect solution, butt I was
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then you throw it in your eye. It's excruciatingly painful but was all the rage around the greater LA area. Bloodshot eyes were the new split tongues. I was proud of my
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ten miles of barren desert, but apparently he didn't notice. Also, my jacket wouldn't zip back up and my breasts became sunburned. As the sun fell, the coyotes closed in
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A neutron bomb. "Crown me champion and I won't blow up the--" and then my finger slipped.
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gave him sloppy, wet kisses, with tongue. His boss usually sang "It's Raining Men" on the machine, and he realized that this wasn't just a karaoke bar. The boss's high-cut shorts
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"Q: So, what do you do for a living?" "A: Woof." I turned to the man next to her. "Q: And you sir?" "A: Yes." "Q: Are you, in fact, a pink princess?" "A: Yes" "Q: You're no fun
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a fairy, too. You think vampires, werewolves and zombies are a problem? Nobody wrote mounds of fiction warning of transformation into tiny winged ballet dancers. Fairies flooded
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smothering your grandmother so she doesn't have to suffer from crippling rheumatism!" The general took off his helmet and held it over his chest. "God bless, you, Edith
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an endlessly renewable source of energy, which is what powered the new superrobots. They needed our overcaffinated bodies to keep running. This led directly to the Matrix.