My fingers wandered dangerously close to

My fingers wandered dangerously close to her lips, stopping long enough on the way to brush through her brown hair. She embraced it, and gazed deeply into my eyes like a doll would

. I stopped suddenly, under the realisation that I had almost kissed my dog. Quite shocked, I instead took out a pack of pedigree chum and began to

spread it all over my body so the dog would lick it off. Instead it just stared at me like I was insane, but believe me, I had to do this - otherwise

I would have died as soon the beast smelled the blood on me. The dog seemed to understand that I was taking advantage of him.

At around that time, a powerful ghost appeared and exposed itself to both of us.

It's pale form was surrounded by a sort of pulsating white-blue aura, a unique dim light in the dark room

it pulsed in a neon liesure suit. "I am the ghost of Disco's past, Scrooge!" "Many have thought I was long dead but I have come back to warn you about the latest rave..."

Just then David Hasselhoff walked in and started trying to save. . .

a great white shark from the homicidal bikini model attempting to choke him to death with her own body. Hasselhoff threw a stray limb over his shoulder and bellowed...

for a cheeseburger. KITT made sarcastic comments about the state of David's career, but the Hoff payed it no mind - he had a McDouble to eat.