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Jackson Piper was a karaoke singer. The kind that loves himself and thinks all the girls love him too. One day he went to Snoggers night club to do some karaoke. He began to sing

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Professor Orson pondered his question about Freemasons before turning to the subject of Diplomatic Immunity and how diplomats seemed to be above the law

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No matter. If I could translate "a pet unicorn" into their many strange languages, then I could also start writing songs in their languages. That's how I became a songwriter

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Bert Entwistle lived in the North of England, and played the flute. Not particularly well, but he made a few pounds from busking

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Because red hair was never favoured, and thus Tabitha was no longer favoured. So, she became a child actress specialising in psycho and supernatural roles. The money rolled in

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for the speed. Yeah, a mean dance is a foxtrot mixed with River Dance. I come from a small town and dancing is all that we have. No radio, no TV. Just a mean dance..

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Why did I leave my divorce papers in my pants? To end up in the Laundromat! Gee, I coulda thought this through better. I returned on Wednesday and retrieved the papers..

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The battle commenced soon enough. There ahead of me - the man I had to shoot, Lt Gerhard Frunkl. I aimed and fired, and missed. Time to get back to my squad commander and safety

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We watched Sunday Praise TV show together and then I realised it was not Jesus at all, but my younger brother Dylan. Get a job! I said to Dylan. He just gave a sickly smile

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atone for my sins, I'd been bad recently and wondered if watering the local gardens would help. Just then I was stopped in my tracks by a giant