25

The night was colder than I expected, but

  • The night was colder than I expected, but I suppose that's what you get for walking barefoot in the snow.
  • I was, in fact, completely naked & freezing my ass off without even realizing it. My sleepwalking outside problem was growing worse, I realized the next day as I examined my frost
  • bitten body that I could avoid naked sleep walking by avoiding sleep all together. So while buying a box of 5 hour energies at the gas station, the clerk offered an alternative to
  • traditional retirement investment strategies. "I have a contact in one of the major Guadalajara cartels," she enticed. "Guaranteed income, all in non-traceable bills." Her pitch
  • fork was angled right at my adam's apple, making a little dent. "Alright, we'll do it your way," I relented. She didn't know that the Guadalajara cartels worked for me, I had her r
  • Ight hand in the grinder. This made for bountiful coffee grounds. I made coffee ice cream from it and her new right hand held the spoon normally. Nothing had apparently happened
  • to her ability to not play the piano. She still had that. For the first two years she complained of her wrist being wired from all the caffeine leeching from her coffee hand. On
  • the other hand, she complained of the other hand being wired into a rude gesture after surgery to correct her inability to play the piano, even though it was because she had no
  • thumbs. She had been born with 2 each of index fingers, ring fingers, and pinkies on one hand, and 4 middle fingers on the other. Dr. Bird did a surgery to normalize her hands.
  • The surgery did not go well. She ended up with all her fingers on her head ("they just moved", he said), and all her head on her hands. The mess was messy. The surgeon got paid.

1 Comments

  1. Woab Feb 19 2020 @ 13:23

    So good. Boy, I miss hamstak.

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!