Aunt Valetta sent me outside to collect one

Aunt Valetta sent me outside to collect one more squirrel for the origami paper-making lesson. She was the only person I knew who could flatten an ordinary squirrel and create

beautifully patterned origami paper. The look on their cute little rodent faces as she grabbed their legs, twisted and flattened them was just so adorable. Just ahead I spied a

red squirrel. I thought that would make good origami paper, although it did look like it had been in the rain, so I would have to dry it first so it didn't smell.

My origami project was ON. I shipped the paper express to be toasted in the Tuscan sun by lithe Italian racing drivers. Worth created an exclusive perfume 'eau de creau' to spray

on the crowd gathering to watch my origami project. A chorus of sneezing from those allergic to the perfume sent a gust of wind blowing origami papers every direction. My dream of

of swimming with Margaret Thatcher in the Bay of Pigs was still on my mind. All these folding paper fools were freaking out about the ruined origami project, but me? I had bigger

folds to make. If things went as planned a series of faked "natural" disasters would fold Canada up into the shape of a proper tophat for America to wear. After that, Mexico would

Be wearing the shoes that fishermen used to wear. This was one absurd folding story, but it somehow matched reality more than many. Better to laugh than cry, my mum always said.

Until she found one to many wallets. She did not know what was in it when she took it. It fell into her locked purse accidentally by mistake et cetera et cetera wink wink & a nudg

e nudge, followed by a dusting of voodoo powder, reanimated the lady's birds. The budgerigar and the blue parrot briefly touched beaks before flying off toward the sunset.