I made a mental note to drive more carefully. This kind of thing can wear thin on someone after the fifth or sixth time. Kris put her hands on the wheel in exasperation and that’s

The football team had lost another one. 0 and 11. Everyone hung their helmeted heads and got on the bus. Lumpy the couch just shook his head. The fat kid in the back yelled

Mia was waiting by Cleopatra's Needle. She looked over the wall of the Embankment into the brown water of the Thames. She thought she saw something large move beneath the water and

Whitebait! Get yer whitebait here! Genocide on a plate! Mitchell's a great man, he is! Come and but your genocide!

She woke up with a bad cold. If she could only

The pirate robot factory blossomed into flames, and four shadowy figures lept from the inferno into the nearby grass. The squad of zombie ninjas consulted their trochee manual, and

You cannot control me. I can still move my lips. So long as I can lip sync you can't own my soul. I'll just lay here and sing "This Magic Moment," and let the tears run

Five years ago, Chloe was badly hurt by her almost two-year boyfriend, Dave. He broke up with her because she became so clingy, demanding and possessive. The worst part was,

"Lisssen youhh iyydiotsh. Hey'rre c-c-cominggs. Hey'rre ta onnes ta did alla dis ta mee. Hey'rre c-comminng! Hey'ree c-c-comminggs! They agh. They agh. Th aaaaaaaggghhhhh." We

Mr. Tomato just about had it with all the misery and angst that afflicted the world around him. He had nothing to do with any of that. So one day, he sold everything and

Seething beneath the surface of her smile was a subtle sense of slightly soiled subterranean sensations.

Why are you here on this planet? At first I'm stunned. What do you mean why I'm here. I'm here because my parents got married. I don't really know whether they planned to have a ba

I T s H I G H N00N

There was something about him I just couldn't put my finger on. He looked vaguely familiar, sitting there on the curb, hit feet tucked under & hat pulled low. Slowly I approached

Three ladies at a bar argue who's more refined. The 1st orders a beer in 3 languages. The 2nd says cheers in 3 languages. The 3rd says "I can belch in 3 languages" drinks the beers

For years during every thunderstorm I rushed to mix chemicals in front of any available window, hoping that, by some miracle, the accident that gave the Flash his powers would be

The framed photograph was all that was left of the mother's lies. The mother's lies that made up their happy childhood. A childhood where they needed nothing but wanted

Somewhere, dawn was breaking. I could hear it. It sounded very much like breaking glass. I'm not a morning person, and I don't respond well to being yanked out of my warm bed by

Hang gliding in the nude, Frank mused, was fine in theory. But in practice it was downright chilly and the wind created an extremely uncomfortable sensation in his

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