When I had nearly recovered, I found my way to the bridge, where Captain Nemo was navigating by organ music. He turned stiffly. "Ça va? The Fourier Transform doesn't always produce

'Ah help' aliens are trying to steal my brain . I shouted in my sleep. "hey stark ,what are you shouting about?" asked my friend. Stark woke up from his bed. He was shocked

"No no I don't think YOU understand" the ad guy said. "I don't want juicy" (he made air quotes). "I want a frikkin flash flood in my mouth! I don't want flavorful. I want a grenade

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!! FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!!

"Oi! No! Get off! Stop it!" But it was too late. Luis Suarez had bitten the postman again.

He fell in love with her the moment she flicked her tongue out to capture the tiny bit of marshmallow clinging to the tip of his nose. "S'more?" she giggled. In the firelight, she

One hot summer day, a few friends and I decided to go to the swimming pool for the afternoon. We all thought it was a great idea since we had the whole afternoon free.

What will come of this monstrosity? Who will believe my terror? Maybe I eliminated the only believer. Gone. Like a thief in the night but I am the one who stole. Stole the belief.

It wasn't long after I took the dog for a walk that everything started happening really fast. When the police arrived I

The breakfast "nook" was really more of a closet, but in proportion to the rest of the house. How a giant

I find that squirrels are the most intriguing creatures in zero-gravity, especially when

'WTF did I do last night?' he thought before noticing the beer cans, liquor bottles, take out and clothing littering

Tonight is an excellent night for murder. It's beautiful outside, crisp with the fall wind adding an edge to the world. And she will love it as I will-for her it will be

The sound of resonating crystal began at 3:33 am. The glass next to my bed, half full of wine vibrated and rang. I noticed, along it's edge a trail of fleeting condensation, as if

Forgiveness borne from years of connection and sweet love making flashed, then faded forever from her eye. Somewhere in her head, every justification that could save me disappeared

"Wrong!" he shouted with triumph that bordered on eroticism. "You are so bloody wrong that it is putrid and pathetic. You are so wrong you will never be right again." With that he

"Everyone sucks. The world sucks. Buying stupid crap sucks, after a while. The majority of the crayons in the box suck," then he stopped. His son was only four and looked upset

I could feel my eyes begin to well up…The sickening feeling of tears running behind my face, into my nose and down the back of my throat. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t even gasp.

A rapier's wit, as it turned out, was no match for an actual rapier. He found himself buckling as his boots swashed blood and utter lack of control onto the planks. A writer had no

A feeling of unease took hold of me as I noted that I was surrounded by ironic kids in bad clothes. I had somehow wandered into a den of hipsters. One of them offered me a PBR