"Alright, who was the nimrod who ground down a mascara pencil in my automatic pencil sharpener!" The office was silent but all eyes fell on

I pulled up to Lunar Outpost 43, spent and filthy. "Lemme get 2 proteins, a carbo, and a double rehydrated Absinthe." I turned to the Martian next to me. "Looong day." It

Sandra shook out her long brown hair and looked towards the stairwell. It had been a hell of a day but she knew Sammy would come. He always did.

Soap floated in the blood.

Sure, I like writing. But what I really enjoy is SQRITING. Have you tried it? It's cheap, easy and clinically proven to

Hobbes pounced Calvin down.

"A theatrical performance, 7 letters - something something e something t something something" her husband questioned. This is the last one and we can send off for the grand prize o

Corky the Cockroach had a confounding conundrum. He hated germs, filth, & fouling food. While other roaches waded into the resaurant's raunchy remains, he gingerly picked pristine

"I won't be friends," Fred said. "I will deal with your psycho Burmese stalker, but on the condition that you agree to be my girlfriend." Clare looked at him and

The great conductor Karstein raised his baton for the finale of his composition. The orchestra poised for the climatic finish. He clutched his chest and went limp on the podium

I shot the sheriff, but I didn't shot the,

No matter how far he went, teenagers continued to harass Mr. Shore. They seemed to get worse and worse every time he moved to another town. Just now, one of them was knocking.

Un dia un extraño forastero hiba paseando por el campo cuando de rrepente escucha un tiro. Ba corriendo para ver que pasa y escucha otro tiro, entonces se dio cuenta que habia caza

My first crimes twenty-one years ago were the beginning of my quest for elegance in larceny, but I didn’t know it at the time. I didn’t really hate old Mrs. O’Malley as much as I

Playing video games was Bob's favorite thing to do. but one day, something unexpected happened.

i got beat up and i cried so they peed on me and it was bad sooooooooooooooooooooo i

Miss. Willard was a kindly old woman who lived at the end of the street. She passed out toothbrushes every Halloween instead of candy. She smiled a lot. I hated her, but not for

It was sad, it was just too tough, too bad. For how in these modern days, men have lost the gumption to dread the death and misery of their fellow men. And each passing year they

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There is passion in the soap. Their passion is in the soap. The soap is their passion. Show compassion if you must but not where I can see it. It disgusts me like baseless lies.