On the date of August 11, 2011. A 97 year old lady was rushed to the hospital. She had been gaining weight over the past 9 months. I just so happens that

By the time she could turn around i turn down the

Something's wrong with the avocado pears.

A new social network for positive messages only kicked me out after one post. They thought this wasn't positive: "I like how everything is orange here ... very Jim Jones-esque."

I'm so bored I should...

Are you tired from a long drive on Highway 66? Are you looking for a nice place to rest? Why not come on over to Bates Motel, now with Color TV and miniature golf!

Yesterday as I was walking down the street when I found what looked to be a dollar but no , it was a rare foreign coin from which belonged to the bank....I went to return the coin

He pulled out a joint. It was fat and gnarled like a parsnip. Michelle's eye brows arched in appreciation. Biden smirked, "Got this from Pelosi. She said it's from Castro's own

Don't forget: What hieroglyph am I today? Don't forget. What hieroglyph am I today? Who gives a duck? Wrong season, wrong reason. And the others I already forgot. All of them la

In marigolds appareled, he entered the throne room of the Lizard Lady Queen. "You know that I don't like marigolds," she snapped. "Now put some clothes on." Gurfo Mettra disc

"Come and look at the ground," shouted Elsie. A small crowd was gathering around her, some bending, some crouching. Someone dragged a grey wheelie bin over, opened it & jumped in

This is the story of a girl, who cried a river and drown her boyfriends fish. She looked so sad and needed some cheering up and.....

Jenna pulled the cookies out of the oven. "umm yummy" she said "look at these tommy" she called as tommy her son ran into the kitchen.

If there were only some way to tell her that I would be there for her when she got home. Even if she says it does not matter. Even if she says she won't come home.

Little did Tomas know, pressing the "back" arrow on his media keyboard would spell certain doom for the tribe of caramel-coated gummi bears he had stashed in his left pants-pocket.

The spider landed on the fat lump in the back of her neck. It sunk it's fangs into her flesh. The smell of porkchops wafted into the air and the spider

spot was lying on the ground again, with his paws stretched out in front of him, staring at the trees.

I chopped apples, put them into a dish. Flicked off some sliced slug (organic!), slapped on some pastry. In the oven for a random amount of minutes. I am a Domestic bloody Goddess

Car lots and used car lots as business models had been beaten to death. I found an empty field and opened a potential car lot. I was offering irresistible deals on 2018 Buicks and

I recoiled from myself. I fled down dark alleys with dimly sputtering exit signs and dead ends at every turn. I couldn't run far and fast enough, but to my greater horror, wherever