Sitting in class, wondering what to do, I decided to

Lisa lifted the gooey cinnamon roll to her mouth and took a bite. Todd laughed. "You know what they put in those things?" Lisa shrugged. "Well, I'll tell you. They put

I handed them the bent spoon. "That's it?" "Yes, that's it." "No clairvoyance, remote viewing or ESP?" "Nope." "I'm not sure if your the sort of agent we want for the CIA." "Wait,

Miss. Willard was a kindly old woman who lived at the end of the street. She passed out toothbrushes every Halloween instead of candy. She smiled a lot. I hated her, but not for

"Don't tell me to shut the fuck up, you filthy dirty hippie! I'm goddamn Bill O'Reilly, so piss off and go get trippy!" Well, how was I supposed to react to such abuse? I had to

The press called it the Fairy Tale Murder. “The Turnip” had similarities to the death of a root vegetable farmer found in a bag in a tree with an Encyclopedia page in his mouth.

Becca snuck into her ex's house every night, only stealing what she could fit in her bindle. Tonight, she sought his heirloom: the remote control. Stealth ops were required because

There are some things you just can't practice, like zooming in a jet-propelled one-man rocket suit, either you do it or you don't.

Rainbow Dash screamed in agony as Pinkie Pie used her devilish instrument to extract that... thing. "Rainbow dash, stop screaming, I cant take out your splinter without tweezers!"

"Because you have no ass." That upset her. She had a face. She had class. She nice breasts. But it was true, she had no ass.

Hello, my name is Rupert Toshiba, i work with computers and enjoy playing on my laptop all the time. I once got a virus, it didn't work for ages so to resolve this i threw it!!!!!

I picked up my dark shallow mind from staring at the floor, just to find my enemy hoovering me. I should've never told her mother that she

Renegade Fitness Model Fights Back Against The Powerful

I packed my ba

"I have only one request of you, my son," he said, his eyes bearing down on the child like anvils, "avenge me, should I die in battle." "Dad, you're only picking up milk."

Peter Griffin looked at the ramparts. They were strong. With the garrisons full, he should be able to withstand an attack from Westeros's King, Lord Stewie.

"Time for our date," said Death, patting the backseat of the tandem bike. I wanted out. "Sorry, I, uh, didn't bring a helmet. I wouldn't wanna fall off and die." This saddened him

This story is about the friendship of 2 spotty dogs, their adventures from the Sahara desert to the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem, their eventual marriage and bizarre deaths in Cairo.

And now ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for, the highlight of the evening. I give you your contenders for Woman of the Century. First off we have

It was dark. Foreboding. The kind of night that makes your shoulders tense up once you exit the back door into the yard. Is that the sprinklers? No, they're off. Something