A glistening drop of dew hung onto the edge of the fairy's just opened hollyhock flower and she stretched and picked her sharp little teeth. It looked like a good day to

It started off innocently enough, as most of these situations do. I was in the cereal aisle, looking for the Kellogg's Corn Flakes, when I saw her approaching the Pop-Tarts.

It had been a long, tiring day. Unfortunately I lied awake in bed, unable to decide if my insomnia was due to my erection or devastating chicken-nugget farts that choked the air.

Her last show ended. She went home, walked up to her support chamber, closed the door. The arm lowered and removed her "helmet." The Emperor appeared on the hologram and

I imagined the table to be like a giant rectangle alien. It was a flat hard alien from a planet of table legs. Then my client wept. The judge spoke. Stupid judge, always ruining

Jimmy loved the ocean, but he couldn't stay afloat without his yellow ducky inner tube. On a particularly foggy Pacific morning, his inner tube popped when he brushed up against

'If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me,' he crooned into the mike. Sheila's cheeks burned cos she knew the song was meant for her. She started to

There was no way I could have known it would turn out like this. I'd met Geoff at a Hollywood club just 3 weeks ago and now I was staring down at

There once was a boy from Madras. He always came last in class.

He went down to the 7-11 and decided that he was going to stand right outside the front door and sell the stolen cigarettes 1$ cheaper than

I beat my mate at darts and stinky farts last night. He wasn't too pleased. He'd held both records for 2 years running. Tonight it's the burping contest and I'm eating lots of

Sixteen years ago I spoke before a jury of my peers and confessed to them the nature of my dreadful crime. Some laughed, others reeled in disgust, while other still fainted. But

Jezikara of Mars was happy to supply her customers with poly-dichloric-euthynol (or "youf-n-all" as the AtaviChavs of Tharsis Ridge liked to call it). If it was illegal on Earth,

In a lonely cave, one man lives by himself with his butler. He has only one friend. He decided to go fight some bad people. Espcially his arch nemesis, Joker. They fought until

Bubba droped out of skool in six grad to help on the fambly soy been farm. His grammer weren’t so good and his speling too, but he had onyl three days to writ his will befor

And then Joe Black said, "The truth? The truth is that you've been fucking Death. I'm an eternal supernatural being in a dead man's body and you divirginzed me." Vomit came up her

But he couldn't tolerate this crap acting anymore. He was a God. They were, well twits. He walked over to the craft services table and decided to eat his feelings. He hated

Listening to the satellite radio station play the old "Johnny Dollar" whodunnit radio program from the 50s, Jared knew that he would be extra-sensitive to any sudden

I laid on solid black porcelain floor. I knew i was dead. The question is where am i now? I stand and look around. I see a mirror and go towards it. I look into its depths and see

Phazon from the Mad Sea Cows of Untranquility savored the echoes of his chuckles. "Murder in the Martian Catacombs ... " He nearly shrieked again. Upon the obsidian tiles lay