This morning when I dropped a deuce in the bowl I could smell our sex from last night. The yeasty moistness that your snapper gummed on my bumpy pole really made me

Phil looked at Anita incredulously. "You can't be serious! It can't be done!" Anita only narrowed her eyes at him. "Phil, don't make me question my attraction - to your brain."

It was a mistake, I knew, to buy the grape soda. It never sat well in my stomach. Also, I won the contest prize in the fourth can, which summoned Beelzebub to my living room.

Can you teach a bear to dance?

I was hiking one day when the ground gave way beneath me! I fell down quite a distance. I looked only to realize i was trapped in a cave! I looked around for a way out. I decided

I was walking along the garden path when I heard a cry for help. I looked around but couldn't see anything. Then I saw this tiny little box. Could it be coming from this small

"No, seriously, I can't believe it's not butter!" I said, scooping another dollop onto my slice of bread. Stephanie rolled her eyes. "That's because it's not," she sighed.

There was a little liar called Gnaus. As a child, he grew up in the jungle alone. One day, he came across a stranger.

With friends like these, you have to wonder where it all went wrong. Jonas was always popular in his heyday, but he never imagined that

The ragged black slippers quietly disintegrated at his feet; chewed up reminders of a dog who fetched them. She had been, of course, eaten long ago. Times were tough and meat

'A jetsam enema' is an anagram for 'James Manatee'. Coincidentally, our detective sensed a terrorist paddleboat dumping excess nukes in Lake Baikal, and he was gonna flush 'em out.

"What's black and white and red all over?"

A sharp pain flew through my toe., or at least where my toe used to be. It has been 10 years since I lost it and still can't believe it happened . My mother would laugh if she knew

Hello adventurer! You have entered an enchanted forest filled with wonder do you... Talk to the grizzled dwarf? (Go to Line 2) Kill him? (Go to Line 4) Make your choice now:

Of course, the party as a whole might have been called off totally. For all I know, this guy might be some aspie fuck who tried to organize a party without his mother's consent, an

The wheels spun and smoke was billowing out as she dropped the flag. As the Cobra gained traction the 520 HP engine torqued the car and I was headed straight toward her. I had

She looked out of her kitchen window.What she saw was less a lawn, more a field. Had it really been 6 months since she dragged that mower out of the shed?Well it would explain the

The man sat in a tree, waiting for his wife to call. How had he gotten himself into this predicament?

Unicorns gathered on the banks of the stream surrounded by flutters of fairies and wood folk. A misty dusk subdued them as the current pulled the burning infant elf king's funerary

It is 5:00 in the morning and I can't sleep.Maybe its because I slept in the day or maybe I