Jim was a weeds farmer. But wherever he planted his weeds seeds, nothing sprouted. "Where do all the weeds go?" he asked the heavens as his downward-growing weeds emerged in

Lately I've been stuck imagining what I want to do and what I really think. But instad of being truly introspective, I'm going to blow out and be a little inapproproate! Shame on

"Now I'm just fucking bored", Sandy said to herself as she gazed out the window towards her neighbors house. "Spying on people, what is wrong with me?" She placed the binoculars

Will there ever be a time that hot cheese sandwiches are not appreciated anymore? The crunchyness of the bread, the gooey runnyness of the cheese, ah the delight of the cheese that

Thick Hatch splattered his acolytes with his ink brush. "To hell with mincing about on eggshells and stringing words like popcorn in a storm! Folks are fundamentally unpeaceful, so

Her name was Donna, and because of that they called her Bella and the band was The Bella Donna Destiny. If they had a style, it was

'It's a very blustery day' announced Pooh. The wind tickled across Pooh's stomach & played havoc with his duodenal ulcer which lay but inches beneath. Dr. Tigger was to perform an

"Is this really part of Ayurveda massage?" Tiffany asked as her masseur sucked the silver toe rings off her foot. Bagavad wagged his head noncommittally and

The Eternal Inflation Lecture Council gathered in the star chamber. The diamond secret had finally escaped. It was inevitable. As the Pulsar Chronicles had always said.

Stan lost it this time. He'd been tutoring this nimrod for weeks without a breakthrough and now he was done. Stan gestured wildly and cursed at his pupil. That's when Candy started

The vast systems of caves dug into the cliffs were 33 miles northwest of DeMoines. No one knew what

Keyboard Keith sat on the steps outside the studio. He told the producer he was not going to leave, he was going to play loud organ music until he was finally let in. He had casio

"I'm sorry, sir, but all of you need to die except one." Jack was shocked. "Look, it's great that cheap nanoreps let you visit all your global friends, but Earth is overheating and

Someone once told him he looked like Haggar and one day he looked into a window at Bloomingdale's and he saw himself- he really saw himself apparently for the first time...

"Hey guys, I'm gonna fly!" Said that one guy at work

The three weird brothers gathered at the first tee. Jasper, as was his wont, picked up the golfball with his mind and gave it a good toss. Brougham

Elemental. A being of steam and fire. That was what I was, what I had become. I had once been a wizard, a man of logic and skill. Now a sweltering creature of hell and instinct

My father had left to me a silver belt buckle with the symbol of π on it. When the Unity Government started isssuing posters and billboards with just π on them i realized

once there was a cat

An astronaut, a cosmonaut, & a taikonaut are sitting in a capsule orbiting Earth. The astronaut says,"We're passing over the USA. Land of the free. Home of the brave." 10 min later