A pessimist, an optometrist, an oncologist and a talking prune walk into a bar. The bartender says to the group "What would you like?" The pessimist says "Meh, you won't have it."

Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga, Aroooga,

Spacey LaFete lived in a Quonset hut down at the southern end of Turkey Creek, a place where the Wallahatchi once roamed...where now there are trailers filled with Rednecks.

OK, THIS is IT. I am tired of messin' around! 2 points here, 3 points there...it's pitiful. This story right here...the one you are reading right now...is gonna earn 100 points or

His life was a simmering stew of chainsaws, beef jerky and wrong answers. That's why he was so happy when

My name is Mudd, with two Ds, the second D is silent; in theory, if only one of them is silent and the other one isn’t, it doesn’t matter which of the Ds is silent and which isn’t.

Sara move to another country and lost contact with all her old friends. She misses them a lot. she also tried to contact them but can never get in touch. In her mind

Have you ever noticed that "Arkansas" is just "Kansas" with an "Ar" in front of it?

Things I did today instead of doing things on my List of Things To Do Today: 1) Folded stories. 2) Took an extra long lunch. 3) Deleted 492 old emails. 4) Stared at the wall.

Things I have learnt while writing folds. 1. I use 'so' a lot and when I run out of characters I delete every 'so' & it makes no difference. So I don't need to use 'so' so much.

"List of Things I Have to Do Today" 1. Scrub the toilet 2. Do my laundry 3. Walk Fido 4. Find out what I have in the refridgerator and make dinner 5. Find the car keys I lost last

My tweed waterbed is the centrepiece of my boudoir. I use it to seduce outdoor types such as gamekeepers, assistant gamekeepers, gamekeepers mates and environmentalists. Rough twee

Because I could only believe myself as far as I could throw me I decided to hire a private investigator to tail me and see who I met with when I was busy doing other things. I was

I am a prosperous, despicable, two-faced, incompetent, ill-mannered, mindless, callous, miserable, corpulent, blustering, erectile-dysfunctioned, man and I would like your vote!

If ever there was a time to use his cell phone, this was it. But he had left his charger at home and the phone was dead. He squinted down the road and could just make out

Sepia toned, haunting lullabies poured forth from a steely guitar while the brassy voice of the singer stirred us.

[Ominous brass] [Clashing, discordant cymbals]