"HADOKEN!" shouted Ryu. "You're losing it" said Ken. "You had it in the 90's..now you sound like your hearts not in it dude. You need to raise your game or they'll replace you."

The purple doubloon hit me in the eye. MAN, I love Mardi Gras! All dat Cajun food, nekkid folk everywhere & the drinkin'! Only ting: Ain't no place to pee on Mardi Gras Day.

Would chocolate be enough to bribe the border control police into letting me cross into Canada?? I had left my passport and ID in my wallet! And God only knew where I had left

Bertie wore a cool party hat to the occasion but when he got there, he noticed everyone was just staring at him. "Jumping Spiders Gone Wild" would be his downfall, especially now

I said GO AWAY. No, wait...stop. Turn around. Come back. No wait... Just go on, leave. Yes, I mean it. Right now. No wait...stop. Turn around. Come back. Yes, I mean it.

So, yeah, I apparently opened a dybbuk box by accident & Fizzuzu the Dybbuk of Indigestion now resides within me. I've tried everything (even calling Matisyahu, but he's powerless

The electric monk pushed his way onto the platform. It was of vital importance to his mission that he made it aboard this train. Just as the doors began closing, he managed to stic

"Don't leave me in Hell without you," whispered Hades to Persephone. "I want to see the sun," she said. The torches of blue gentians flared blue in the darkness.

"Do we have a sufficient supply of milk?" asked Gary. Nancy rolled her pretty green eyes & chided, "Why don't you just say 'Do we have any milk?'"

"Have excess bodily fluids? Donate to the Red Cross!" she reads over the PA system during homeroom. I pause, then

Broken inside, thats what she said as she walked out on me, taking my

She wheeled around the corner of Fourth and onto Lenora. I checked out the marquis at the Cinerama in case I had some free time but it wasn’t anything I was interested in.

Michael was thinking of something nice and exciting thing to do on weekend when suddenly

Stepping from the deep pit she yells "I think I found an ancient salt mine!" Damn, he thought, there goes our plan to raze Romania for the cross-europe nuclear pipeline. "Shut up!"

As odd as it was, the primary thought going through John's mind was ~these gates are really just white, not really pearly~ as he entered Heaven. An angel approached, carrying two

I don't understand why I have to register my neutrino rifle. Doesn't every galaxy bounty hunter have the right to have protection? The Star World Marshall looked up at me and

It was an unlit and tempestuous period between sunset and sunrise, when ey sauntered inside. I was imbibing solitarily and quite ebrious. I gazed into eir optic opening and beheld

I started to write this yesterday and finished it up today. But in between then and now I can't remember what it was I wanted to say. I'l reread it tomorrow and to see if it comes

"ITS NOT MY FAULT!" screamed the normally sanguine Samantha as she stormed into the tent and sat down in a huff. Ok, sure, she HAD invited the entire cross-country team

He peeped into the Jim Beam bottle. It took him two years, but it was finally done, the entire Manhattan skyline out of balsa wood and toothpicks. Then he sneezed,