The servent boy fell to his knees at the Kings feet. The King looked down his nose at him with such disgust. "I here by banish you from the kingdom for commiting such a crime"

Carl was scanned the text displaying on his screen, "Click here to download GeniusLog to improve your web browsing tools and experience," it said, but Carl just wanted fold stories

"It doesn't matter what you eat as long as you eat something," she said as she pumped more nacho cheese into a bowl and ate it with her fingers. She was an amateur dietician and

Once upon a time, two young cowboys embarked on a three day hunt. Four hours out of camp they came across a small herd of five pronghorn antelope. Roy pulled out his six-shooter.

All this time I thought the song was "Cheesesticks" not "G6", w/this new found enlightenment, I started 2 rethink other things 2. Parachute pants R still cool, right? Skinny ties

"Well, there you go then," she thought as the door slammed. She heard the car reverse out of the drive, into a tree, crunch gears and head off down the street. The broken glass

As the producer of the remake of "My Dinner with Andre," I had a huge crisis on my hands. 3-D post-production? Green screen? Toy tie-ins for the kids? And what about the Chinese?

On my way to the local asshattery to pick my ass up a new hat I stopped in the cupcakerie for a red velvet and a cup. A retired haberdasher took note of my chapeau and quipped

Someone told me. It's all happening at the zoo. some young chimp ate his poo. I do believe it. I do believe it's true. Mmmmm mmmmh woooahh mmmh..

Hobbes decided he wanted to kill something. Then Calvin entered the room. And Hobbes

Once upon a time there was a teacher.

"What did you say your name was again, sir?" the clerk said, cocking his head. The tall bearded man looked down and muttered, "I said...my name is...Turly Curd."

As he looked at the dozens of horribly mutilated unicorns laying around, general Alcazar realized his birthday party had gone terribly wrong. "How is this even possible ?"

In Loughborough, a town in the Charnwood borough of Leicestershire, lived Vaughn Colcolough who had a tough 20 yr. hiccough & though he tried many a remedy they were all for nought

Coleopterametamorphobia: fear of being transformed into a beetle is a rare condition whchi caused F.'s insomnia. While the family cocooned for the Winter, F. wrote his epos "The

My coworkers dont like me playing the nannerpus commercial on youtube. I dont see the issue, I mean, it's NANNERPUS! It's a dancing banana on a bunch of pancakes, whats not 2 love?

Hero, my little Ugandan friend, was the Grand Marshall for a New Year's Day Parade.

The man in the bright green 80s strapless tube dress and torn fishnets winked a heavily made-up eye at me, then, twirling around the lamppost, stuck his ample behind sheathed in

If you are going to criticize someone - feel free to criticize the weaknesses of their convictions or the content of their character with abandon, but when you focus your attack on

The time has come to say goodbye. He waved his hand and sent a kiss, I replied with an erect middle finger. The train moved and slowly accelerated, he was stuck in the rails