Cheshire grins drifted from the heavens like fat snowflakes. To be touched meant immediate and perpetual mirth resulting in a long, riotous cachinnate towards death by starvation.

Roast the broomstick. Fiddle. Bury the bone. Nookie. Makin' bacon. Hiding the bishop. Boom-boom.

The 21st century is characterized by the ubiquitous presence of technology in everyday life. New generation students are surrounded by computer related instruments and will

Take it from me: if your recent folds are all about food, you should unskip lunch. Similarly, if they're all about unrequited love, find yourself a sock (I splurge on argyle) and

The crow landed on the sill and said, "Nevermore!" Hellraiser was eating a chicken pot pie, he looked at the window and

"A fat lady's ass." Dr. Nexus showed him another inkblot. "A box of Krispy Kremes." Billy spoke flatly. "And this?" "My mother." Dr. Nexus looked at me and nodded imperceptibly.

Molotov's attempts to create the perfect strawberry daiquiri had so far proved to be disastrous. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to let you go Slava" sighed taberneiro Stalin sadly,

Open up your head and let me step inside. Rest your weary head and let your heart decide. It's so easy...when you know the rules. It's so easy! All you have to do is fall in love.

Life is hard for chewing gum. Imagine being packed, pristine, in a little cardboard envelope, only hours later to be chewed by any undesirable who should choose to purchase

As soon as I changed the tire on the van,

Red Riding Hood awakened from the attack feeling strange. She felt her teeth--fangs. She looked in the mirror--no reflection. Then the wolf knocked at the door

A freshly sharpened pencil. Your favorite song. Cool water on a hot day. Hot water on a cool day. A good joke. The second beer. Requited love. Wildflowers. Snow on Christmas Day.

"Here are the plans, don't give them to anyone!" said my double in a polka-dot suit and disappeared in a blue flash. My double in a striped suit appeared, "I want those back."

One boring day in English 101 class. I decieded to take a small nap, due to the lack of sleep. Right when I fell alseep the teacher,

"Fellow shareholders, after years of effort from our team of paleontologists and molecular biologists may I present to you the Brontosaurus burger!" "Dad, it's Apatitosaurus!

In the golden years before the leash laws, Pagliacci, Schatzi and Pepe were out out their evening cat patrol, when the big black poodle picked up the scent of a bitch

I want to tell the story of a durable little neck zit. It started out like a subterranean volcano, wide, hot and sloping. I really tried not to pinch while it was still gestating b

Help! I've been laminated!

The crow said, "Get rid of your copier!" And flew off. Tammy finished her Tiger Tail. She looked around the office. Had anyone seen that crow? Heard it? Andy was

It had been nearly a year since THE EMBARASSMENT