There was a cat and it could talk. One day it said HAI to the dog.

@JeanValJean im goin 2 find u valjean u cant hide from the law. dam u #hashtag @Javert pls no i have to save this cute baby injured seal, then ill b rite back honest #hashtag

"Well dude, you've been saying put a camera on me, put a camera on me. Well, put a camera on me. Jesus!"

Onyx sat, staring at the ice blue eyes looking back at him. Not entirely sure what it was, it moved with the same fluidity as he, the same timing. Copying his every nuance.

You were in your space station, surrounded by obedient cyborgs, when the end of this galaxy came on like a Pink Floyd song. The event horizon sparkled out at the edge and

It had been such a long time since I had a deluxe chimichanga from El Diablo's Taco Emporium, and I'm not sure I ever did, but I was suddenly overtaken by a craving for one, and I

“Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you?” said, Robert Reich to Bill Clinton.

Bored at a state banquet, George grabbed the rock lobster bedded in shrimp arranged to look like a hammer & sickle and yelled "Food Fight!" lobbing it at Hu. Jintao's bushwacking

Our mom made us go to Mrs. Sorber's house on Halloween, even though all we ever got there was apples. Mrs. Sorber made us sing songs too, to earn our unwanted apples. This year,

Sad but truth.Nail polish all over her wedding dress.Her motter told her not to leave it hanging there uncovered!Why did she have to retouch her nail so close tothe fucking dress?U

It is friendly and polite to say "Hello" when you see someone you know. In the morning you can say "Good morning" or when you pass someone in the hall you can say "HI".

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THE INVISIBLE EYE Once upon a time, in the small village of Hoover, Alabama, a child was born with a very curious condition: little Jenna had an invisible eye inside of her mouth!

The room was filled with toddlers busy playing with their toys. I strode in, set my books down on the podium, then announced, "Welcome to Calculus for Toddlers. I am

Young teacher, the subject of school girls' fantasies.But these girls were half his age, yet they knew twice as much. He tried to teach them calculus.They taught him other lessons.

Byron was getting weird so we sent him on vacation, but when he got back he put mosquito netting around his cubicle & when the secretary came with the mail he said, "Me Tarzan, you

Unmoving, I stared into the mirror contempulating the reflection glaring back at me that was not my own. I shuffled my feet and with this slight movement the relfection...

The Brown Plaid Spinach was "only" a cover band, but most of their covers put the originals to shame. Marty Edgers' worm-eaten Gretsch had something to do with it, haunted by the g

In 2013 ETS replaced its PRAXIS exams for future teachers with a new, simpler one- the Voight-Kampff test. In the first 5 minutes of testing, over 75 future teachers were revealed

As Steve set fire to the only evidence of his record setting theft of one full quarter of the worlds oil supply, he wondered if there would be any negative repercussions for his