Sheila was never the brightest. They told her she couldn't pour piss out of a boot if they wrote directions on a heel - she didn't get it, of course. But one day Dr. Milo Krazinski

The kindling would get things started, but they hadn't had time before the sun set to get any real firewood. Each of them knew that when the light went out, it was over. It would

Everything was fine when the birds stopped singing and the wind no longer blew, but once our reflections started lying,

Larry was the misunderstood Stooge.

Sitting down in front of the laptop, she placed the tiara on her head and checked her teeth for lipstick. Last time she played chat roulette there were too many

Baking cookies required stamina once fossil fuels had disappeared. You had to hire an Olympic cyclist to run the generator for twenty damned minutes to get the oven to a steady

Let me tell you, being Noah's neighbors on the cul de sac is no picnic. All that builder racket, and I know for a FACT that that friggin ark is one cubit into my lawn. I've a good

She cackled over the screams of the children. She wasn't accustomed to cackling, but it was all she could do not to piss herself every time one begged for help. Standardized tests

"ZOMBIE PONIES" was the rallying cry at Slickmo Toys Unlimited. They had already lined up the syndicated cartoon show, kid's cereal and temporary tatoos. Their next step,

I knew this inevitable day would come. Poppy, the ventriquist, hopped onto the stage

soon king apple fell from the tree and demanded to be eaten but something happened during the fall that

James sat next to Jose and wept pathetically. They both hand three children and were out of work. Jose looked up and waved off a cup of tea. The robots were even doing that job.

Storm clouds drifted across his bedroom floor. It'd be an awful night & he could hear harps foretelling. The violins stabbed at the air. Whatever nightmare awoke him wasn't over.

Luella Maple Thorpe had been cheated of the ultimate American pedigree. A Mayflower ancestor. Instead, Jebulun Maple had opted for a cheaper cabin on the Speedwell. The trip was

The hipster at the bar look like Frank Sinatra on a 60's album cover. What goes around, she thought. Still, he was cute, in an earnest way, so she bought him a drink and

Sheila's face became somber and she hugged tight a tiny ‘Elmo’ who started shaking and giggling like a schizophrenic epileptic. It was apparent who wore the pants in his family.

Wind whipped around the corners of the buildings, sending scattered newspaper pages sailing down the street. The street, now empty, where just moments before

As a kid my mother gave me enemas. When I broke into the womens dorm and gave my first victim an enema the 'enema bandit' was born. The press and Zappa song made me famous.

He was filling out Christmas cards. One to Phil. Another to Aunt Gloria. He scribbled the usual crap. But when he read what he wrote he saw a confession for murder. For multiple

I wrote the final loop of the code. Nothing to do now but wait until the Reality Forge processed the incantation into a new world. This was my best yet. Filled with