When I write a book

Hoomla! To weezum again the gentle caterpunk of the Shrincken lava pits. To intartly pinckle the Humbles of Funnickly. Salop! I Fagan, am a duppled patiworl, snaping for a grumlop!

I couldn't keep my eyes off of the woman sitting to my left. Stupidly hot, driving a 6 speed better than any man I had ever met in my life. Alas, everyone has a hamartia, and hers

"Are these my pants?" Dan said, holding up a grimy object. "Your pants," I said, "are not my area of expertise. Perhaps you'd like to phone a friend?" "OK, I'll call Bianca," he pi

Weedy flower gardens crept slowly into increasingly narrow strips of lawn. I was having a conversation with my friend.Suddenly, something started pulled my leg....................

Entrepreneurs increase their wealth, governers their power and the learned revel in their vast knowledge, but you are here to better the condition of humanity and its cousins,

The older guy Sharona had been seeing was turning out to be a possessive creep. All this my, my, my business, and all the talk about getting it up and making his motor run was just

When I was in middle school, I became friends with another girl who has Down Syndrome. The other students made fun of me, and bullied me, but I just ignored them.

Scuse me while I kiss this guy.

"Hold up! Can you go slower, please?" Troy was struggling to keep up with Amelia as she dashed in and out of shrubs and around thick evergreens. This must have been serious.

There was once a giant t-rex that liked to eat everyone and everything! His name was ILjaijfskldn... or just "Oh crap there he is!" for short. He was absolutely terrifying and stuf

The CD's were covered in mite-dander and cat hair but they were free. Thousands in alphabetical order given to them from a dead doctor. They'd gotten them because the family didn't

I didn’t stop her as she walked into the woods. I spent the rest of the morning and afternoon breaking out the remaining windows of the factory with rocks. I was a little

The Flash had always been a pre-ejaculator. He could never figure out a solution, once he tried to masturbate before having sex but he pre-ejaculated with himself, which is why

Biden, alerted by an aide, logged into the site. His trademark smile fell away as he reached for the phone. "It's me. Find the bastards. Extreme prejudice." He chuckled as he

The casino owner didn't want to talk to this washed-out black woman. But she brought in some old white musicians and she said, "my group is called Tina Turner Overdrive." The owner

Now that we had settled the argument in my favor, I was ready to move on. I was stupid to believe she would give in that easily. As I began to relax she pounced and I was

Jeff folded his large, batlike wings behind him as he lit on the ground. He was in the middle of a deserted suburb street, hoping to hell he could find a good liquor cabinet to

NASA says its GPS satellites show that maps are going to have to be redrawn.

This is the stuff of countless schlocky sci-fi films that have tarnished the image of science fiction for decades.