So i sat there, with ciaran young, and joe eller, eating chapstick, whilst sittin' on da toilet, AINT NOBODY GOT TIME FO' DAT!

There once was a man named Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. He was shot in the head on accident after attempting suicide with the same gun. He was resurrected and then he

"Don't give me that innocent look.You're grounded young lady! And no more World of Warcraft this week", Mr. Henderson scolded his one yr old. Cindy had soiled her diapers again.

It was late afternoon in old Indochina. Madame Wong was lying on a low couch on a jjunk floating down the Mekong. She lit a small opium pipe to keep the flies away from her face.

I tend to evaluate my life decisions in long car trips. Tonight was no different, one single burden briefly illuminated by the alternating glow of street lights.

I was fell up into the sky one day.

"Jimmy, you've been a good skywriter for many years, but it's time for you to brush up on your skycursive." "How come?" "Last week you tried to make 'Marry me' but it looked like

The boys and I would put Freebird on and go for an M60 gun run. When we really got crazy we would change to the 50 cal and put on Simple Man.

Mirna was convinced the rat was her father. He had her exact eye color. Even his foot twitched, like hers when she was nervous! She picked him up by his long tail and hid him in

Just as she was showing him the door, (good riddance) an alert came off the TV. "Due to a Homeland emergency, everyone must stay indoors for the next 48 hours."

See Dick drive. Dick drives a flashy car. Dick picks up Jane. They go to the drive-in movies. See Dick put the move on Jane. He's at first base. But he's not playing baseball.

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune cookie must be in want of a

The white elephant gift exchange party at the office holiday party was an utter disaster. The problem started when Sven didn't understand the colloquialism and showed up with a

Mr. Henry's history class was very popular because of the period costume banquet that served as final exam. King Henry's feast featured roast pig, a jester, & a mock beheading but

The makers of Snakes on a Plane and Snakes on a Train, bring you Llamas on a Lighrail, Roaches on a Bus, Hyena's on an People Mover, Real Ponies on a Carussel and

yes on earth that amazing place just like hevean the place that i know am never reaching so why to bother and do good stuffs while i can be bad bad and have earth here on my side

It was crowned the "Starbucks Crash" by the mob and the press. The incident was notorious and retold with sneers and grimaces and became synonymous with

MAKE HIM STOP REPEATING (repeating) EVERY WORD I SAY! (I say...) I just about had enough with those two in the back, we were in the middle of Utah and our radiator was at boiling.

"I think we should do what the Eskimos do. Just kick the old people out of the igloos. Leave them for the polar bears and the storm." "Um... Thanks for your input Jerry.

He walked over with a pint and a pernod & ice and sat down opposite. He'd already put some water in the pernod. She was surprised to see that he was sober.