Once there was a young woman who got lost in the big city. She wandered for hours.

"Why haven't you started potty training them yet?" asked the grandmother, seeming confused and almost a little angry. "Well, they just don't seem ready yet." replied the man.

Kyle had never felt this much anger before. Chad had just poured out all of his monster energy drink. Kyle punched another hole in his wall, but it wasn't enough.

It was broken. Nobody knew why. But that was a lie. Vincent knew that there was a very real threat sitting in the school hall. Was it a teacher, a child or one of parents?

King Richard Simmons set off to the holy lands. Finally, after years of battle he alone would the liege that

The wife laid out a dandy of an Easter basket for little Jimmy. But Daddy had the munchies some'n fierce. You don't think he'd miss just one chocolate bunny do you?

"Bring me the Baron alive, but do what you want to the rest," said Capt. Purplebeard from the crow's nest. The pirates cheered in unison. "Dress-up!" They forced pillagees to wear

Don loved his duck who advised him in all manner of life's ups and downs, and so on the day of his court appearance on charges of insobriety he smuggled in some brewskies and Daffy

The soul came back two times. I think we’ve located it. Quick somebody catch it in the Birdhouse! We all ran toward the Birdhouse, but...it was too late. The soul had slipped away.

My 83-year-old mother covered her mouth with her liver-spotted hands. Her eyes twinkled gleefully. "Yes...yes I did," she giggled. "I called him 'Mr. Dildo' by mistake!"

At the changing of the pants ceremony a crowd of tourists gathered. Everyday Vernon would change his pants at exactly 9.23 pm. The best spot for viewing the changing of the pants

The Professor and I looked at the strange yellow blob on the ground. "You tell me," he said. "Is that a living creature or not?" I observed the blob-thing more closely. It had

He stood 6 feet 8 inches and was chiseled muscle from calves to traps. Intelligent, worldly, a terror with the ladies. Also, his name was Frances. This meant that

The S.S. Incredulous was surrounded by a fleet of Rog Rovnitovs's alien pirates in international spaces. "Scum! And we were so close to Xephyr," said Commander Erma Gerd. Missiles

My wife said "You know the one. She's young; attractive." Alarm bells went off. Feign ignorance, & you're busted. Express confirmation, & you're busted. I said "You mean yourself?"

He was scanning the want ads & found it under a picture of Shaka Zulu riding an Alpaca. It read "Adventurous souls with no attachments or moral ballast. Expedition to sulphurous

My "friend" said he thought ponies were stupid. Now, I have him tied up in my basement, He's wondering what the heck I'm going to do with him. I ignored him and grabbed by knife.

Cranberry the Cat ate Dolly the Duckling with some apple sauce. Damian the Dog ate Cranberry the Cat with Dijon mustard. Felix the Fox ate Damian the Dog with celeriac remoulade

Fran's Kafka sat at the back of the coach of the 18-30 holiday to Marbella. Morose doesn't even come close to describing his general demeanour. He'd left Prague with high hopes of

Cinderella felt ill and instantly blamed a slice of pumpkin pie she had the night before.She should have that stupid fairy gothmother hang for not letting her throw that giant pu