Trouble maker since birth,Spike the Dog was bffs with Snowball the Cat,experienced in the fine art of manipulating his humans into doing anything he wanted.One night,Spike got home

Pro Tip: when drinking at work on a Friday it's best to keep the lights low and turn on some jazzy music to distract people. Put out some pretzels and just subtly dance around.

"Hello all! I'm KJ Nutt, hole expert. Did you know? Holes can be used to stand in! And, they can actually make you appear a bit shorter or 'smaller'.

Over thirty days of drizzling rain and my mood is as dull as the cloud who's unselfconscious drool oozes down my window. Can we all scream "GREY", god i'm sick of grey.

It was dark, and had been for a long time. So long that Mimi couldn't remember what light was like. That's why when she opened her eyes that October evening she was shocked to find

Ding-a-ling. Ding-a-ling-a-ling. Ding-a-ling. Ding-a-ling-a-ling. Ding-a-ling. Ding-a-ling-a-ling. Ding. Ding. Ding-a-ling.

Food was scarce in the Wasteland. To my right sat my dog, and to my left sat my father. My eyes darted between them hungrily, and I knew that I had to make a choice.

'Are you a punctuation mark?' 'Yes.' 'Are you a subatomic particle?' 'Yes.' 'Are you an amusement park ride?' 'Yes.' 'Are you an interplanetary magnetic field?' 'Yes.'

First, stand with legs wide apart and squat down as low as possible. 2nd, put the palms of your hands on the floor in front of you & stretch out your fingers. 3rd, squoosh forward

dhdgh

Her breath came out in short bursts as her legs carried her across the field, wet grass squishing beneath her sneakers. Sweat beaded on her forehead, bare arm wiping at it.

"Psst, Hey bud." "WHO ME?" "Shhh..." who me?" "Riiight. How would you like to buy an O for just a buck?" "A BUCK!" "Shh.." "a buck?" "Riiight" "SAY AREN'T YOU PAT SAJACK?" "Shhh...

I would be ashamed if you could hear my snarky thoughts. Like the pang of guilt an axemurder feels while axeing a vixen into smooshy eighths, this is how I know I'm a good person.

"Sometimes I see flames and sometimes I see people that I love dying..." The jet black radio murmured as the static faded. "...and it feels like somebody was gripping my throat"

"Mom, look, I'm a unicorn!"

He sat down. Quietly. He read the barf bag. He'd felt a little jumpy and scanned the passengers coming on board. No body language cues. A ten year old said, "You're an Air Marshall

In the apocalypse, even the celebrities were turned into zombies. However, this had little effect on their careers. Tay Zonday released Chocolate Brain, and Justin Bieber

"Let's play Doctor." "Err.. Dr. Curleigh, You ARE my Doctor." "Well I want to be the patient this time. Here put on my smock & stethoscope." "Yes Dr...." "... and don't call me Dr.

Desperation is one of those themes that only pokes it's head out once every blue moon, but this was a fitting moment for Jack. His hand flashed out a glock and it vomited lead into

This is the stuff of countless schlocky sci-fi films that have tarnished the image of science fiction for decades.