Have you heard?! The restructured meat product sandwich is back! It's back! I'm going to stop on my way home and get three. Two to eat right away and one to put in the fridge for

In those days, people texted while walking, while driving, while riding. They looked at their hands but did not wake from the dream. The missed the night the sky was decorated with

Lewis, Hathaway and Mothra made their way across the quad to Professor Wilkinson's offices. He offered them tea but Mothra was overly particular and so instead, after a long pause,

Some 20 years ago, Noah, Geoff, Dan & I created FoldingStory™. When we started it was just a game to collaborate on writing stories. Now who can imagine creative consulting without

Chet Chalmers tore the NYT in half and tossed it. It was a quaint but cheap bit of stagecraft. "Team, we cannot afford to let Conquest make headway into our noodle empire. Ideas?"

The green cow

They'd left the Chimp "Chortles" at the Chimpanzee rescue home in Tustin. They couldn't take care of him anymore. "Chortle's" heart shattered, rotted then turned to a vine of hate

She was in love with grammar, he was a passionate entomologist. Their children, Ellipsis, Oxford Comma and little Rhagodessa, were often left to their own devices as their parents

Benedict Cumberbatch slithered seductively across the cold marble floor, I stared, fascinated yet slightly revolted, as Maggie Smith, in character as the Dowager Countess and nude

He had the faintest recollection of having a truly outstanding idea. On his hand was written "asparagus goal priceless". Asparagus goal priceless? What in the hell did that mean?

Inside the porcelain palace the toilet whisperer was able to coax a change in the

They all cheat at cards and the checkers are lost. My cellmate's a killer and they make me do push-ups in drag, but nobody cares if you're losing yourself.

Turn away, If you could get me a drink of water 'cause my lips are chapped and faded. Call my aunt Marie, help her gather all my things and bury me in all my favorite colors, my

When I awoke, it was pitch dark and I could barely hear the sound of two male voices--but not loud enough to hear what they were saying.

Its been over 20 years since, I stuck the stick in that wonderful pink powder, but even now as I get ready to dip it for the first time I can feel my mouth puckering in

The stars twinkled brightly and the waves crashed hard as I

I carefully carried the moonbeams home in my bra. After a night out swinging on a star I found the moonbeam in a jar. I considered feeding the moonbeams to my fish but

"WHY?!" he screamed. as his mom rushed in, to find her son having a nervous breakdown on the floor. "What's wrong, honey?!" He replied: I read Cupcakes! Again! Why Pinkie Pie, why"

Why does my hair smell like vomit?

Would you rather for 10 minutes have to hang onto the top of a car going 100 mph OR try to stay on top of a hot-air balloon in the sky?