Once upon a time, a teacher....

There was a time in my life when my feet were webbed.

The words had come out of her mouth in pitch-perfect bitchery. A frost settled across the breakfast table. He smiled, and closed his lap top. He picked up the scrambled

To get me back, Ole Scratch sent me a plague of chickens, who stealthily laid their eggs of evil within my home. Nothing to do but continue the grim egg hunt. If one ever hatched

When people heard he carried a defibrillator, they instantly thought heart problems, but his heart was fine. It was his brain. He looked at it. Too bad Ceasar didn't have one.

Her lips were as cold as her hands. He leaned close and caressed her blonde hair. It was streaked with dirt now. He wanted to cry, but no tears came. He was so sore from digging.

"My pancreas?" I let out a sigh. "I don't even know what the hell it is or what it does." The doctor walked over. Instead of comforting me he looked me right in the eyes and

Jacques Harigato lowered himself silently into the vault. His shoulder hairs detected no untoward vibrations, no wayward vibrations, but also no good vibrations. His back hair

Johnny B. had ridden over 2000 horses in his life, but this one was different. He could tell from the moment he got into the saddle. The horse was clearly overweight, but something

There I was. The waves had washed me ashore on this, apparently, deserted island. The storm had sunk the boat I was traveling on with my school friends. It was supposed to be the

The dragon from Shrek was seen by Godzilla in California. Godzilla was in love with dragon her name was Scales(let's go with that). Thus, Godzilla ran all around California and

Once upon a time, a scout went on the road of vengeance and decided to scout and route out the area. He killed endless amounts of people in one shot kills and a giant kraken

The other day i was walking down my neighborhood when someone started.....

"Milk, Milk, Lemonade, around the corner fudge is made! HeHeHeHeHeHe" said Peter Griffin on his wedding night, everyone in the audience was shunned.

I tend to procrastinate and sit on Facebook too much when I should be

"I wish he would just leave me alone" Mathew said to himself, " He's such a nosey person, maybe he should just go and talk to his own sun." Mathew got up and then

Then wonder woman sold her invisible jet to the third in command of Al Qaeda. He was not as charming as Bin Laden was, but Bin was dead. She sold the invisible jet for

'Near mercy' (in much the same way that 'near miss' signifies a miss) = 'Mercenary'. Coincidence? Perhaps. But to yeasayers, I tell the story of Barry the Mercenary Canary. He flew

Ordinarily, this would be the room with the decontamination gel, but for some reason the room was dry. The lighting was wrong. I notice that my running bra is tighter than it was.

Ordinarily, there is more to do at the mall. With all my friends busy, I decided to visit Victoria Secret. I am enamored by the detail in the mannequins. So sexy, but this one was