The idea was never to go with the subway sandwhich diet. But when traveling coast to coast a foot long goes a very long way. Gas prices be that they are, leaves very little

He couldn't sleep. He'd tried pills, counting sheep, flipping the pillow, rubbing one out, reading primary literature. After 3 days with no sleep he felt a crazed detachment

Aaahhh-bottle of wine. Does it matter if its a screw top or cork? I don't care. Either way wine invokes nightmares. The other evening I was kidnapped by trolls...red wine vs.

Welcome to Planet Xog earthlings. As you can see from our appearance we are very much like you apart from the extra head and the foot sticking out of our ears....pardon???

First I got off the train and headed straight for the shop. I knew he'd be there. I wanted to let him know what was up, you know? Make sure it never happened again.

It was the night before my birthday. And from my window, the rainy world outside seemed like the saddest place.

I was a big fan of Star Wars as a kid. I guess that's why I wore the Vader mask when I robbed the 7-eleven. When they showed me on the evening news I couldn't help but feel pride

"OMG, look at Ben's cute butt!" Gianna texted her BFF Destiny 5 feet away from her and 11 feet from the 17yo male walking past the Claire's mall store where the girls worked.

One more time he referenced the "hero with a thousand faces" and one more time

I really don't have a better story than the time that girl with cerebral palsy wandered into my bar on clown night, and those drunken lunatics took her into the parking lot and

"There's a cyst in your tube" wasn't the diagnosis I had been hoping for.

Be fruitful and multiply? Bitch please. I'm gonna be fruitful and exponentiate.

"You're not going out looking like that," she told her husband. He assessed his appearance: yellow duckie inner tube, clown shoes, bermuda jumpsuit, and

Over the years, I realized that popularity looses its value which leaves the popular people with no more power.

I was in my room when i saw a spider and it bit me. I turned into spiderwoman and got green goblin and then i was on my way home when another spiderwoman came up and it was on, so

In the great country of Finland...

The soul of James Brown and been transferred into the Pigeon by God. The Godfather of Soul Pigeon landed on top of a

The morning smelled of raw fish and sweat as the boat pulled into the docks of the early hallow's eve. Daliah loved the smell, reminded her of home.

The bags full of used up Christmas cheer were bundled near the door. The use of wrapping paper always sank his mood. For a brief moment, someone smiled, but through it, not at it

tardy lady, time left is but a shorty. move quickly, 'coz lazy bathing won't make you an early darling. :P