If I were a bird I'd fly away.

If I were a bird I'd fly away.

If I were a turtle, I'd peek out at the whole world and then creep deeper into my shell.

Unfortunately, I am a giant tortoise and must bear the weight of the world or some unknown number of other tortoises all the way up. If I were to have a look, the whole stack would

topple and thus the universe would collapse. And, as a humble tortoise, and I can't bear the thought of killing every single other living and non-living noun in the universe. I

decided to dump my sense of guilt on another tortoise so that he or she could carry the wait of three worlds for a change. Suddenly there was another tortoise below me. Then anoth

er. Soon I had a new problem. No longer did I have the burden of holding the three worlds up but now I had the problem of trying to get down from all the turtles I placed bellow me

. "GET OFF OUR BACKS", the turtles bellowed, and I scrambled down, using their furious little-old-man heads as steps. My eyes darted about for an exit from this weird world.

It was then that I realized I was in Congress and that Mitch McConnell had just poked his head out of his shell. "Is there something you wanted to say?" he asked me.

"No, not really," I replied before quickly looking down at my lap. I had no intention of keeping this farce going. I just wanted to get out of here and back to my real life.

"you're wanting to get out of here, back to your real life" they said, reading my mind. I was stunned. but, how did. "we're in a story, I see up to 180 characters of your thoughts"