I peed in the pool. Shame enveloped me like

I peed in the pool. Shame enveloped me like sick jacuzzi jets. When Jason came up for air, I could see a little water got in his mouth and

I gagged. I must've turned green, because Jason asked me:"What's the matter? You can't even go for a swim without getting sick? Jeeezzzzzz!" It occurred to me he deserved my pee in

his general direction. I can't swim. I never could. I'm 30 years old and every time I get in the water I am nauseated with fear. Still, I get into the pool and make an excuse to

pee in it, because I enjoy the feeling of my warm pee and the thought of other people swimming around in it. After I've done my business I'll make an excuse to leave quickly, like

"I have to pee." Blame instantly shifts to the elderly or kids with juice boxes. After showering under the slide's runoff, I've used the "I have to shower" excuse when leaving. And

when someone finds a bite out of a brown bunny rabbit, I give the excuse "I have to Easter". Or when the fridge is empty, "I have to not starvation." Because I am a crocodile.

Crocodiles have no concept of direct objects, lest we forget. The vanilla egg looked good, though, and Captain Hook's mouth watered at the sight of it. Piercing it with his hook,

Black goo pursed the beach and hissed constantly.

And ever since then, the ice-cream vendor who happened to be near that place was extremely traumatized. Last anyone saw of him was the "hard cream" coming from his pants.