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"I think we should do what the Eskimos do.

  • "I think we should do what the Eskimos do. Just kick the old people out of the igloos. Leave them for the polar bears and the storm." "Um... Thanks for your input Jerry.
  • Now let's get back on topic: Paper or plastic?" Hmm, tough choice, Jerry thought to himself. On the one hand, paper feels good and composts nicely. On the other hand, it
  • 's good to have plastic, 'cause I could reuse them as lunch bags. Wow.This is such a big decision. I just don't know what to do!" Jim began to cry. Choosing paper or plastic overwh
  • elmed the "Captain" from the future. He said he was aboard something called the Enterprise. That he'd visited strange worlds. But Jim couldn't deal with today's grocery store
  • Sales because the items contained toxic chemicals and flavours. Even the olive oil was adulterated and mixed with canola to save money. Jim went to the farmers market instead.
  • He knew both their intentions and products were certainly purer than the usual options. Even their granola was more likely hug him than cause distress, which was a comfort
  • to his now full stomach. Granola could really hug those insides, he thought.
  • The problems tended to compound when the insides started hugging back. Nay, absorbing. Then they didn’t stop & the insides started absorbing my outsides: granola & everything else.
  • I now exist both inside and outside my outsides and insides, in a constant tumbling flux of my insides, which are my outsides, absorbing my outsides, which become my insides, etc.
  • I just noticed a new phenomenon: I am beginning to split in two like a cell. POP! So here I am now, as two organisms. I’d better sign off. “Bye for now!” “Yeah, bye for now!"

8 Comments

  1. KieferSkunk Mar 04 2018 @ 14:52

    From one existential quandary to another. That got weird fast.

  2. EtherBot Mar 04 2018 @ 16:58

    Yeah it did didnt it. Specially imagining it all as kirk, somehow makes it weirder

  3. SlimWhitman Mar 04 2018 @ 18:16

    Sometimes I imagine things as Kirk. Does that make me weird?

  4. EtherBot Mar 06 2018 @ 22:40

    Yes, actually, it does

  5. LordVacuity Mar 06 2018 @ 23:50

    You guys are weird to even pose the question. Just be Kirk and all thoughts of notkirkness fall away like Gorns fall before Joan Crawford.

  6. knight_medek Mar 08 2018 @ 12:57

    Goodness... I’d rather be stuck with Captain Picard.

  7. SlimWhitman Mar 08 2018 @ 17:06

    a) In the turbolift between the Universe and the Antiverse with a somewhat sweaty evil Kirk or b) in the Enterprise B Holodeck with Piccard living out his Barishnikov Fantasy?

  8. KieferSkunk Mar 08 2018 @ 17:54

    I'll take the Barishnikov Fantasy, personally. That sounds interesting.

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