He grabbed me by the throat, slamming my

He grabbed me by the throat, slamming my head into the brick wall. "Never," he yelled, "underestimate the influence the collapse of the Ottoman Empire had on the origins of WW1!"

Alex Trebek was scaring me. "P-please, Alex, let me go." He replied, "Never underestimate the influence the collapse of this wall had on the origins of your death." The bricks fell

about us in random denominations. Half of the Jeopardy audience fled the ruins in fright; the others sat rapt and ready. Despite Alex's throttling, I said, "I'll take 'No Exit' for

£600." Harold Pinter's last performance was "Krapp's Last Tape" so I won some money.

My own character was a no show? I could not even find the courage to as "who am I today" even when did I he to me to ask it. Instead I walked outside and stood under the Smoker's

Awning and lit up a stogy. It wasn't fair, them making us nicotine addicts have to stand out in the cold. Didn't they know we were sick people? Wasn't our skin grey enough? Weren't

our lungs black enough?! We decided it was a bunch of Bolshevik and besides, my comrade Ivan had a bad case of the Trotskys. He was going to need something to Putin real soon.

But I occupied the Poluteburo. My factory was overproducing waste so I was Stalin Ivan. "Just one more Five Year Plan, I've almost completed my campaign!" I yelled through the peep

hole of the office my employees locked me in. I could'nt complete my plan. I was fed through a hole under the door & given nothing but Barney shows to watch. Hence *twitch, twitch*